That in Temptations One Learns Lessons Not for Oneself Only, but for Others

THERE is another great advantage in temptations, and one very important for those whose business it is to aid their neighbor; it is that under temptation a soul is taught lessons not for herself only but for the benefit of others, experiencing in herself what she has afterwards to see in those whom she has to guide and direct. Under temptation the soul is exercised in the spiritual warfare, and by attentively considering the comings and goings of the Evil One, she thereby learns the lore of a spiritual master to guide souls, for experience teaches much. Hence the proverb: “No better surgeon than the man who himself has been well knived.” As intercourse with the world makes men wideawake, practical, and experienced, so do temptations. They that sail the sea can tell the perils thereof (Hcclus. xliii. 26). But he who hath never been tried, what doth he know? (Ecclus. xxxiv. 9). He will know nothing either for himself or for others. The man who hath had experience in many things, will be a man of many resources; but he who hath not had experience deviseth little (Ecclus. xxxiv. 9- 10). He who has been well inured to these spiritual wars will make a good pastor. That, then, is another reason why the Lord wishes us to go through temptation, that we may have dexterity as masters of spirit to guide. To carry on this thought further, the Lord wishes us also to be tempted, that, when we see our brother come to us in temptation and affliction, we may have the sense to compassionate him. It holds in the spiritual as in the corporal order that one who has had many infirmities and attacks of illness will be the man to compassionate and receive with charity and love those who are in the like distress.

Cassian tells of a young monk, very pious, but much vexed with impure temptations. He went to another monk, an old man, and told him plainly all about these temptations and bad motions which he suffered, thinking to find consolation and remedy from his prayers and counsels. But it turned out just the other way. The old man—who was old in years only, and utterly wanting in prudence and discretion—on hearing of the temptations of this youth, got horrified and began to bless himself, and gave him a rough handling, scolded him in harsh words, called him a miserable wretch, and said that he was unworthy of the name of a monk for having such things passing through his mind. In the end he sent him away, so disconsolate with his rebukes that the poor monk, instead of coming out cured, came out more sorely stricken, in great sadness, discouragement, and despair. And now he had no thought nor concern for any remedy to his temptation but to put the matter into execution, so much so that he took the road leading to the town with this determination and intent. The Abbot Apollo, one of the holiest and most experienced of the Fathers who lived in those parts, happened to meet him, and at sight saw from his appearance and mien that he was under some grave temptation; so he began with great gentleness to ask him how he felt and what was the reason of the disturbance and sadness that he showed. The youth was so lost in his own thoughts, so absorbed in his imaginations, that he answered never a word. The old man, seeing that his sadness and perturbation: of mind was so great as not to allow him to speak, and make him seek to hide the cause thereof, importuned him very lovingly and gently to tell him of it. At last, overcome by his importunities, the young man told him outright that he could not go on being a monk nor resist the temptations and motions of the flesh, according as the old man had told him, and that he had determined to leave the monastery, return to the world, and marry. Then the holy Abbot Apollo began to console and encourage him, saying that he too had those temptations every day; and that he must not be alarmed or give up on that account, for these things are not so much overcome and turned down by our own efforts as by the grace and mercy of God. Finally he begged him to stop for at least one day and return to his cell, and there beg of God light and remedy for his need. As the term asked for was so short, he gained his point with him; and, that gained, the Abbot Apollo went off to the hermitage or cell of the old man who had scolded the youth. When he came near, he put himself in prayer, and kneeling on his knees, and lifting up his hands with tears in his eyes, he began his prayer to God: “Lord, Who knowest the strength and weakness of each, and art the tender physician of souls, pass on the temptation of this youth to that old man, that he may learn at least in his old age to have compassion on the weaknesses and troubles of the young.” Scarcely had he finished his prayer, when he saw a hideous little-negro shooting a fiery arrow at the cell of that old man, wounded with which the old man came forthwith out of his cell, and went like one distracted, coming out of the entrance and going back again; at length, not being able to keep quiet or find rest in his cell, he took the road which the youth was taking to the town. The Abbot Apollo, who was standing looking on, and who by what he had seen understood his temptation, went up to him and asked him: “Where are you going, and what cause or temptation is it that makes you forget the gravity proper to your age, and walk with such haste and precipitation?’ The other, confounded and ashamed by his bad conscience, understood that his temptation was known, and found no words to answer. Then the holy abbot took his hand and began to read him a lesson. “Go back,” he said, “to your cell, and understand that up till now either the devil did not know of you, or reckoned nothing of you, seeing that he did not assail you as he is wont to assail those whom he envies. By this you will know the smallness of your stock of virtue, that at the end of so many years that you have been a monk you have not been able to resist a temptation, nor even to endure it and stand out against it so much as one single day, but at the very outset you were overcome and were already going off to put the thing in execution. Know that for this the Lord has permitted this temptation to reach you, that at least in your old age you might know how to have compassion on the infirmities and temptations of others, and learn by experience to send them away consoled and encouraged, not in despair, as you did this young man who came to you. Doubtless the devil assailed him with these temptations, while he left you to yourself, because he had more envy of his virtue and progress than of yours, and thought that so strong a virtue must be countered by strong and violent temptations. Learn, then, from this in your future life to know how to compassionate others, and lend a hand to him who is going to fall, and help and lift him up with soft and loving words, instead of helping him to a fall by rough and disagreeable speeches, according to that word of Isaias: God hath given me prudence and discretion, that I may know how to encourage and hold him up who has fallen (Isaias 1. 4), and according to the example of Christ our Savior, of Whom the same Isaias says, quoted by the Evangelist St. Matthew: The bruised reed he shall not finally break, and the smoking flax he shall not finally extinguish (Isaias xlii. 3).” The holy man concluded by saying: “And since none can appease or check the movements and excitements of the flesh otherwise than by the favor and grace of the Lord, let us offer prayer to God that He may deliver thee from this temptation; for it is He Who wounds and He Who heals, He Who humbles and exalts, He Who does to death and quickens.” The holy man set himself to prayer, and as at his prayer the temptation came, so also at the same the Lord took it away at once. Thus hereby both the youth and the old man got their cure and their lesson together.