Sundry Important Warnings in This Matter

ROM what has been said we may gather sundry warnings, as well for him who is corrected as for him whose duty is to correct and admonish. First, for him who is corrected and admonished, it must be observed that it is a great fault, and argues great imperfection, when upon the superior’s rebuking or admonishing anyone of any defect, the man resents the admonition, and thereupon goes up and down inquiring who has told the superior, and whether he has told more, or exaggerated the thing much; and takes to complaining afterwards and offering excuses to this person and to that, making out that this thing was not so, or that it was not so bad as was represented. That is a great fault, and often does more harm and gives greater disedification than the original delinquency. We all know well and acknowledge that “I am a man and have my faults;” but when a person resents things in this way, we judge him to be very imperfect, showing as he does much pride, and giving occasion for our suspecting him of having no mind for amendment and spiritual improvement, but caring only to have an easy time of it and stand well in public regard and estimation.

St. Bernard says very well: “As for him who seeks to throw a veil even over the faults in which they catch him, and perhaps tells a smart lie to excuse them, how shall I believe that he will reveal the secret faults which he alone can know?” ‘The truly humble man, who knows himself and takes himself for what he is, is not astonished at anything they say of him, nor is it anything new to him, since he always knows of greater faults in himself and thinks what they say little in comparison with what there was to say. To your mind, your fault seems less than it is, and sometimes no fault at all, because you see it with eyes blinded by self-love; but your neighbor, viewing it with dispassionate eyes, sees it in a different light. But suppose a case in which your accuser has been guilty of exaggeration, stating the matter as it appeared to him, do you not remember that, when you entered religion, they asked you if you would be content to suffer injuries and false witnesses and affronts from people within the house and from people outside, and you answered Yes? How is it that you have now forgotten and repented of your profession? You should have been glad of your accuser’s, with the best will in the world, saying more than what happened; and even though it be that it was not with a good intention, or any kindly feeling that he said it, you should still have rejoiced for what concerns yourself, even your greater humiliation, and over your being made like to and imitating Christ, our Lord. How much more, when it is said with a good intention, and you feel that he speaks the truth in what he says, and meaning your good, should you not be glad? In this way you gain more with men, and with God likewise; in the other way, when you think to gain, you lose.

Much greater would be the fault if, lighting upon him who might have given the information, you were to go the length of telling him so, and complain because he spoke, or because he said too much, or told the story in another way from what had occurred; or if you frowned or looked daggers at him, giving him to understand what was thought of him for what he had done. Anyone with a sincere desire of amendment and improvement would rather wish to have many eyes fixed upon him, to help and oblige him more to the perfection that he desires. Such was the desire of St. Bernard. He says: “Who will give me a hundred shepherds to be told off to keep me! The more I have of them, the greater the sense of security with which I go to pasture. O amazing folly! A man has no hesitation in gathering a multitude of other people under his keep, but cannot endure to have one watching over his soul. I fear more the teeth of the wolf than the crook of the shepherd.” That is what is to be feared, the wolf; but the precaution and pipe and care of the shepherd is not a thing to fear, but to desire. This is the good spirit; and, contrariwise, to resent there being eyes to watch and keep guard over you, besides being evil, is generally a sign of there being good reason to look after you with some care. And let this be observed also in other similar matters. We see by experience that they who complain of and resent their being carefully looked after, are just the persons who have most need of it, and by thus complaining they render themselves more open to suspicion. A good and humble religious finds more to fear in looking after himself than another can fear about it; and therefore he finds matter of rejoicing when they help him in this case, since it is his business that is being furthered, and he it is that is concerned in it.

On the part of him whose office it is to give the admonition, it is necessary to observe in the first place that the revealing of your brother’s faults must be to the superior immediately, without other roundabout processes; as to a father, and under such secrecy as the fault requires, that he as a father may apply the remedy and prevent the mischief that might thence arise. This should be carefully taken notice of; for sometimes it may happen that a man will not tell the faults to the superior, and will tell them to a private person, who has no means of remedying them. That would be very ill done, because it would be detraction.

Secondly, as regards the mode of procedure in this manifestation, the rule says that it is to be done “with due love and charity,” words which gave great satisfaction to His Holiness Gregory XIII when he examined these rules. He who wishes to do the right thing here must look to it carefully that he be not moved by passion or envy, and that no indiscreet zeal prompt him to act hastily and represent the thing as of greater gravity than it really is, and tell a crooked story, or exaggerate things, making of a fly an elephant, and going from particular to general, or putting forward as a certainty what is a mere suspicion and perhaps a fancy of his own brain. This makes much matter of scruple, and is the cause of great troubles.

Thirdly, it is to be observed that whoever gives the admonition should not cease to do his duty even though the party admonished does not do his, nor takes the admonition in the right way. St. Augustine, arguing well that he who does not take correction properly is like a raving madman who resists physician and medicine, says: “What are we to do with him? Are we perhaps to cease working for his cure? No, by no means; for though the insane patient will not brook being tied or attended to, and although he who is suffering from a deadly sleeping sickness will not have them awaken him, nevertheless the diligence of charity insists on binding and tending the one and awakening the other. Both seem to be offended, and take it for a trouble and a grievance, while their malady is on them; but afterwards, upon their recovery, they are grateful for the benefit and good turn that has been done them”—Ambo offenduntur, sed ambo diliguntur ; ambo molestantur; quamdiu aegri sunt, indignantur, sed ambo sanati gratulantur.

Thus we are to hope that our brother also will behave, although at the time when the admonition is given him he resents it; but when he is himself again, and thinks the matter over by himself and in presence of God, he will come to see reason, and acknowledge and be grateful for the benefit done him. Even brute animals, however much they resist, are at last broken in by men, with much trouble and sometimes danger to their keepers. Of them no gratitude is to be expected, because they have no understanding for that. But how much more is it to be expected, says the saint, that we shall succeed in curing and correcting our brother, that he perish not everlastingly. After all, he has understanding, and will be able in time to recognize facts, and be grateful for the benefit done him, according to the saying of the Wise Man: He will find more gratitude who correcteth his neighbor than he who deceiveth him with flatteries (Prov. xxviii. 23).

St. Basil quotes to this effect the words of St. Paul to the Corinthians (II Cor. ii. 2): And who is it that gladdeneth me but he whom I make sad? This pain and sadness that you conceive upon correction gladdens me, because I see that it is to end in good. What for the present gives pain is a cause of health, because it makes me careful and diligent in future. It is a sadness according to God (II Cor. vii. 11), because it is cause of amendment. But, you will say, there are some who get worse for correction and admonition. To this, St. Augustine well replies: ‘Are we, then, to drop medical treatment and cease to tend the sick because some are not cured by it? No, surely not. Neither, then, should we omit correction because some do not profit thereby. The physician, whether spiritual or corporal, must do what in him lies and what his art teaches him, and not at once throw the case up, but use and try the means at his disposal.”

Concerning the method to be employed in correcting, St. Basil says that he who corrects another ought to imitate physicians, who are not angry with their patient, but all their contention and indignation is against the sickness, and to that they devote their applications and remedies. So he who corrects another ought not to be angry or irritated with the sinner, but give all his care and attention to vanishing the defect and vice from the soul of his brother. And the way he should take herein, says the saint, should be that which a father who was a physician would take in treating a son for a wound or painful sore: see with what tenderness, gentleness and kindness he would treat him; in short, he is like one who feels his son’s pain as his own. In this same way, then, with this tenderness, gentleness, and kindness should the superior correct his subjects, his spiritual children, in a spirit of gentleness, says St. Paul (Gal.

vi. 1). The persecutor who hacks men to pieces, and the executioner who quarters them, says St. Augustine, take no thought of hitting upon joints, or where their knife will pass better; but the surgeon, operating on a patient, considers first where he should cut, and goes about it with much delicacy and caution, because his object is to heal, and not to hack to pieces. This is the way the superior should go about it who wishes to heal his subject by correction and admonition, not to give him pain and do him harm.

This is a thing of great importance, earnestly inculcated by the saints. Let him who corrects another, they say, be greatly on his guard against any display of passion, anger, or indignation, for that will be the ruin of the whole business; it will not cure or amend the delinquent, but make him worse. And they quote that saying of the Apostle: The servant of God should correct with meekness them who resist the truth (II Tim. ii. 25). With meekness, though our version says with modesty, but it all comes to the same; for in order to correct with modesty, you must make no display of passion or excitement. Finally, the correction must be done with a kind air and gentle mien, and with a gracious countenance, so that the person corrected may understand that it springs from motives of affection and charity and desire of his welfare, for in that way it promises to be productive of much good.