Chapter XXXIII

But when I had written this sonnet, bethinking me who he was to whom I was to give it, that it might appear to be his speech, it seemed to me that this was but a poor and barren gift for one of her so near kindred. Wherefore, before giving him this sonnet, I wrote two stanzas of a poem: the first being written in very sooth as though it were spoken by him, but the other being mine own speech, albeit, unto one who should not look closely, they would both seem to be said by the same person. Nevertheless, looking closely, one must perceive that it is not so, inasmuch as one does not call this most gracious creature his lady, and the other does, as is manifestly apparent. And I gave the poem and the sonnet unto my friend, saying that I had made them only for him.

The poem begins, “Whatever while,” and has two parts. In the first, that is, in the first stanza, this my dear friend, her kinsman, laments. In the second, I lament; that is, in the other stanza, which begins, “For ever.” And thus it appears that in this poem two persons lament, of whom one laments as a brother, the other as a servant.

Whatever while the thought comes over me That I may not again Behold that lady whom I mourn for now, About my heart my mind brings constantly So much of extreme pain That I say, Soul of mine, why stayest thou? Truly the anguish, Soul, that we must bow Beneath, until we win out of this life, Gives me full oft a fear that trembleth: So that I call on Death Even as on Sleep one calleth after strife, Saying, Come unto me. Life showeth grim And bare; and if one dies, I envy him.

For ever, among all my sighs which burn, There is a piteous speech That clamours upon death continually: Yea, unto him doth my whole spirit turn Since first his hand did reach My lady’s life with most foul cruelty. But from the height of woman’s fairness, she, Going up from us with the joy we had, Grew perfectly and spiritually fair; That so she spreads even there A light of Love which makes the Angels glad, And even unto their subtle minds can bring A certain awe of profound marvelling.