Uniformity with God's Will

All our perfection consists in loving our most lovable God: Charitas est vinculum perfectionis. (Col. 3.14). But then the whole perfection of love for God consists in uniting our will to his most holy will. This is already the principal effect of love, says St. Denis the Areopagite (de Div. Nom. c. 4.), to unite the wills of those who love, so that they share the same desire. And therefore the more closely one is united to the divine will, the greater will be his love. Mortifications, meditations, communions, and works of charity toward our neighbor are indeed pleasing to God — but when? When they are according to his will. But when God's will is not present, not only does he not welcome them, but he abhors and punishes them. Suppose there are two servants: one toils the whole day without rest, but insists on doing everything his own way; the other works less, but obeys in everything. Certainly the master will love this second one, and not the first. What do our works serve for God's glory, when they are not according to his good pleasure? The Lord does not want sacrifices (says the Prophet to Saul), but obedience to his will: Numquid vult Dominus holocausta, et victimas, et non potius, ut obediatur voci Domini? . . Quasi scelus idolatriae est nolle acquiescere. (1 Reg. 15.22) The man who wishes to act by his own will without God's commits a kind of idolatry, for then instead of adoring the divine will, he in a certain way adores his own.

This, then, is the greatest glory we can give to God: to fulfill his holy will in all things. Our Redeemer, who came to earth to establish the divine glory, came principally to teach us this by his example. Father: Hostiam et oblationem noluisti, corpus autem aptasti mihi; tunc dixi ecce venio, ut faciam, Deus, voluntatem tuam. (Heb. 10.5) You have refused the victims that men have offered you; you wish that I sacrifice to you the body you have given me — behold, I am ready to do your will. And of this he declared more than once, that he had come to earth not to do his own will, but only the will of his Father: Descendi de caelo, non ut faciam voluntatem meam, sed voluntatem ejus qui misit me. (Jo 6.38) And in this he wished the world to know the love he bore his Father, in obeying his will that desired him sacrificed on the cross for the salvation of men; thus he said in the garden, when he went to meet his enemies who came to seize him and lead him to death: Ut cognoscat mundus, quia diligo Patrem, et sicut mandatum dedit Pater, sic facio; surgite, eamus hinc. (Jo 14.31) And in this he said that he recognized as his brother whoever did the divine will: Qui fecerit voluntatem Patris mei. (Matth 12.50) ipse meus frater.

All the Saints have always kept their gaze fixed on doing the divine will, well understanding that herein lies the whole perfection of a soul. Blessed Henry Suso said (l. 2. c. 4): God does not want us to abound in lights, but to submit ourselves in all things to his will. And St. Teresa: All that one who practices prayer should strive for is to conform his will to the divine; and let him be assured that in this consists the highest perfection. Whoever practices it most excellently will receive the greatest gifts from God, and will make the most progress in the interior life. Blessed Stephana of Soncino, a Dominican, being one day in a vision conducted to heaven, saw some deceased persons she had known, placed among the Seraphim, and she was told that those souls had been raised to such glory because of the perfect uniformity they had maintained on earth with the will of God.

In this land we must learn from the Blessed in heaven how we are to love God. The pure and perfect love that the Blessed in heaven have for God consists in uniting themselves perfectly to his will. If the Seraphim understood it to be his will that they should spend all eternity heaping up sand on the seashores, or pulling up weeds from gardens, they would do so willingly and with all their delight. More still: if God made them understand that they should go and burn in the fire of Hell, they would immediately throw themselves into that abyss to do the divine will. And this is what Jesus Christ taught us to pray for — that is, to carry out the divine will on earth as the saints do it in heaven: Fiat voluntas tua sicut in caelo et in terra. (Matth. 6.9)

The Lord called David a man after his own heart, because David fulfilled all his will: Inveni virum secundum cor meum, qui faciet omnes voluntates meas. (Act 13.22) David was always ready to embrace the divine will, as he often declared: Paratum cor meum. Deus, paratum cor meum. (Ps. 58.8 et Ps. 107.1) And he asked the Lord for nothing else than to teach him to do his will: Doce me facere voluntatem tuam. (Ps. 142.10) One act of perfect uniformity to the divine will is enough to make a saint. Behold Saul as he goes persecuting the Church — Jesus Christ enlightens and converts him. What does Saul do? What does he say? He does nothing else than offer himself to do his will: Domine, quid me vis facere? (Act 9.6) And behold, the Lord declares him a vessel of election and Apostle of the nations: Vas electionis est mihi iste, ut portet nomen meum coram gentibus. (Act 9.15) Yes, because he who gives his will to God gives him everything. He who gives him his goods through almsgiving, his blood through self-discipline, his food through fasting, gives God a part of what he possesses; but he who gives him his will gives him everything, and so he can say to him: Lord, I am poor, but I give you all that I can; in giving you my will, I have nothing more to give you. But this is precisely the whole of what our God requires of us: Fili mi, praebe cor tuum mihi. (Prov 23.1) Son, says the Lord to each one of us, son, give me your heart — that is, your will. Nihil gratius Deo (says St. Augustine) possumus ei offerre, quam ut dicamus ei: Posside nos. No, we can offer God nothing dearer than to say to him: Lord, possess us; we give you our entire will; make us understand what you want from us, and we will carry it out.

If, then, we wish to please the heart of God fully, let us strive in all things to conform ourselves to his divine will — and not only to conform, but to make ourselves uniform with whatever God disposes. Conformity means that we join our will to the will of God; but uniformity means more — that we make the divine will and our own a single will, so that we wish nothing other than what God wishes, and the will of God alone is our will. This is the summit of perfection, to which we must always aspire; this must be the aim of all our works, all our desires, meditations, and prayers. For this we must beg all our holy Advocates to help us, our Guardian Angels, and above all the divine Mother Mary, who for this reason was the most perfect of all the Saints, because she always embraced the divine will more perfectly than anyone.

But the hard part lies in embracing the will of God in all things that happen, whether favorable or contrary to our inclinations. In favorable things even sinners know well how to conform to the divine will; but the saints conform themselves also in things that are contrary and displeasing to self-love. Here is where the perfection of our love for God is seen. The Venerable St. John of Avila used to say: A single "Blessed be God" in adversity is worth more than six thousand thanksgivings in things that are pleasing to you.

Furthermore, we must conform ourselves to the divine will not only in things that come to us directly from God, such as illnesses, spiritual desolations, poverty, the death of relatives, and the like, but also in those that come to us through other men, such as contempt, slander, injustice, theft, and all sorts of persecutions. In this we must understand that when we are offended by someone in our reputation, our honor, or our goods, although the Lord does not will the sin of that person, he nonetheless wills our humiliation, our poverty, and our mortification. It is certain and a matter of faith that whatever happens in the world happens by divine will. Ego Dominus formans lucem et tenebras, faciens pacem, et creans malum. (Is. 45.7) From God come all goods and all evils — that is, all things contrary to us, which we falsely call evils; for in truth they are goods, when we receive them from his hands. Si erit malum in civitate, quod Dominus non fecerit? said the Prophet Amos 3.6. And before him the Wise Man said: Bona et mala, vita et mors a Deo sunt. (Eccl. 12.14) It is true, as I have said, that when a man offends you unjustly, God does not will the sin of that man, nor does he concur in the malice of his will; but he does concur with his general concurrence in the material action by which that person strikes you, robs you, or insults you — so that the offense you suffer, God certainly wills, and it comes to you from his hands. For this reason the Lord told David that he was the author of the wrongs that Absalom would do to him, even taking his wives before his eyes, and this in punishment of his sins: Ecce ego suscitabo super te malum de domo tua, et tollam uxores tuas in oculis tuis, et dabo proximo tuo. (2 Reg. 12.11) For this reason he also told the Hebrews that in punishment of their iniquities he would send the Assyrians to strip and ruin them: Assur virga furoris mei . . . mandabo illi ut auferat spolia, et diripiat praedam. (Is. 10.5) St. Augustine explains: Impietas eorum tamquam securis Dei facta est. (In Ps. 37) God used the wickedness of the Assyrians like an axe to punish the Hebrews. And Jesus himself told St. Peter that his passion and death came not so much from men as from his own Father: Calicem quem dedit mihi Pater, non vis ut bibam illum?

When the messenger (who some hold to have been the devil himself) came to Job to tell him that the Sabeans had taken all his goods and killed his sons, the holy man replied: Dominus dedit, Dominus abstulit. (1.21) He did not say the Lord gave me sons and goods, and the Sabeans have taken them away; but the Lord gave them, and the Lord has taken them away — for he well understood that the loss was willed by God, and therefore he added: Sicut Domino placuit, ita factum est: sit nomen Domini benedictum. (ibid) We must not, then, regard the trials that befall us as happening by chance, or by the sole fault of men; we must be persuaded that whatever happens to us, all happens by the will of God: quicquid hic accedit contra voluntatem nostram, noveris non accidere nisi de voluntate Dei. (St. Augustine, in Ps. 148) Epictetus and Atho (Rosweid. l.1), blessed martyrs of Jesus Christ, put to the rack by the tyrant, torn with iron hooks, scorched with burning torches, said nothing else but: Lord, let your will be done in us. And arriving at the place of execution, they cried out in a loud voice: Blessed are you, O eternal God, for your will has been fulfilled in us in all things.

Caesarius (lib. 10, c.6) tells of a certain religious who, though in no way outwardly different from the others, had nonetheless reached such holiness that by the mere touch of his garments he healed the sick. His Superior, marveling at this, said to him one day: How is it that you work such miracles, when your life is no more exemplary than the others'? The religious answered that he himself was amazed, and did not know the reason. But what devotion do you practice? asked the Abbot. The good religious replied that he did nothing, or very little, except that he had always had great care to will only what God wills, and the Lord had given him this grace — to abandon his will entirely to that of God. Prosperity, he said, does not lift me up, nor does adversity cast me down, because I take everything from the hands of God, and all my prayers tend to this end: that his will be perfectly fulfilled in me. And that damage, the Superior continued, that our enemy did to us the other day in burning the farm where our grain and livestock were — did you feel no resentment? No, Father, he replied; on the contrary, I gave thanks to God, as I usually do in such incidents, knowing that God does or permits everything for his own glory and for our greater good, and so I live always content with whatever happens. Hearing this, the Abbot, seeing in that soul such uniformity with the divine will, no longer marveled that he worked such great miracles.

Whoever does this not only becomes a saint, but also enjoys on this earth a perpetual peace. Alfonso the Great (Panorm. in Vita), King of Aragon, a most wise prince, being asked one day which man he considered the most happy in this world, replied: the one who abandons himself to the will of God, and who receives all things, prosperous and adverse, from his hands. Diligentibus Deum omnia cooperantur in bonum. (Rom 8) Those who love God always live content, because all their pleasure is in fulfilling the divine will even in contrary things; and so their very trials are turned into joys, thinking that by accepting them they give delight to their beloved Lord: Non contristabit justum quidquid ei acciderit. (Prov 10.11) And indeed, what greater contentment can a man ever experience than in seeing fulfilled everything he wants? Now when someone wants nothing other than what God wants, since everything that happens in the world (apart from sin) happens by God's will, consequently everything that he wants comes to pass. It is told in the Lives of the Fathers of a peasant whose fields yielded greater fruit than all the others'; when asked how this happened, he replied that they should not be surprised, because he always had the weather just as he wished it. And how? Yes, he said, because I want no other weather than what God wants, and since I want what God wants, so he gives me the fruits as I want them. Resigned souls, says Salvian, if they are humiliated, this is what they want; if they suffer poverty, they wish to be poor; in short, whatever happens to them, they will it all, and therefore they are happy in this life: Humiles sunt, hoc volunt; paperes sunt, paupertate delectantur; itaque beati dicendi sunt. The cold comes, the heat, the rain, the wind — let it rain, because God wills it so. Poverty comes, persecution, illness, death — and I wish (says that soul) to be poor, persecuted, ill; I wish even to die, because God wills it so.

This is the beautiful liberty enjoyed by the children of God, which is worth more than all the domains and all the kingdoms of the earth. This is the great peace experienced by the Saints, which exuperat omnem sensum. (Eph. 3.2), surpasses all the pleasures of the senses, all the festivities, banquets, honors, and all other satisfactions of the world, which, because they are vain and fleeting, though they allure the senses for the moments in which they are tasted, do not satisfy but afflict the spirit, where true contentment resides. This is why Solomon, after having enjoyed such worldly delights to the utmost, cried out in affliction: Sed et hoc vanitas, et afflictio spiritus. (Ecclesiast. 4.6) Stultus (says the Holy Spirit) sicut luna mutatur, sapiens in sapientia manet sicut vult. (Eccl. 27.12) The fool — that is, the sinner — changes like the moon, which today waxes and tomorrow wanes: today you will see him laughing, tomorrow weeping; today gentle, tomorrow furious as a tiger. And why? Because his contentment depends on the prosperity or adversity he encounters, and therefore he changes as the things that happen to him change. But the just man is like the sun, always equal in his serenity, in whatever happens; because his contentment lies in conforming himself to the divine will, and therefore he enjoys an unshakeable peace. Et in terra pax hominibus bonae voluntatis. (Luc. 2.15), said the Angel to the Shepherds. And who are these men of good will, if not those who are always united to the will of God, which is supremely good and perfect? Voluntas Dei bona, beneplacens, et perfecta. Yes, because God wills only what is best and most perfect.

The Saints, by conforming themselves in this life to the divine will, have enjoyed an anticipated Paradise. The ancient Fathers, says St. Dorotheus, preserved themselves in great peace by receiving everything from the hands of God. St. Mary Magdalene de' Pazzi, upon merely hearing the words Will of God, felt such consolation that she was carried outside herself in ecstasies of love. The stings of adverse things will not fail to make themselves felt by the senses, but all this will occur only in the lower part; in the higher part of the spirit, peace and tranquility will reign, the will being united to that of God. Gaudium vestrum (said the Redeemer to the Apostles) nemo tollet a vobis. Gaudium vestrum sit plenum. (Jo 16.22) He who always remains uniform with the divine will has a joy that is full and perpetual: full, because he has all that he wants, as was said above; perpetual, because no one can take it from us, since no one can prevent what God wills from coming to pass.

Father John Tauler (as reported by Fr. Sangiure, Erar. to 3, and Fr. Nieremberg, Vita Div.) relates of himself that, having prayed for many years that the Lord would send him someone to teach him the true spiritual life, he one day heard a voice that said to him: Go to such and such a church, and at the door you will find a poor beggar, barefoot and all in rags. He greets him: Good day, my friend. The poor man replies: Master, I do not remember ever having had a bad day. The Father responded: May God give you a happy life. The poor man answered: But I have never been unhappy. And then he added: Listen, Father, it is not by chance that I said I have never had a bad day — for when I am hungry, I praise God; when it snows or rains, I bless him; if someone despises me, drives me away, or if I experience any other misery, I always give glory to my God. Then I said that I have never been unhappy, and this too is true, since I am accustomed to willing everything that God wills without reserve; therefore whatever happens to me, whether sweet or bitter, I receive it from his hand with gladness as the best thing for me — and this is my happiness. And if ever, continued Tauler, God wished to damn you, what would you say? If God wished it, replied the beggar, I would with humility and love embrace my Lord and hold him so tightly that if he wished to cast me into Hell, he would be forced to come with me — and so it would be sweeter for me to be with him in hell than to possess without him all the delights of heaven. Where did you find God? asked the Father. And the poor man: I found him where I left creatures behind. Who are you? And the poor man: I am a king. And where is your kingdom? It is in my soul, where I keep everything in order: the passions obey reason, and reason obeys God. Finally Tauler asked him what had brought him to such perfection. It was, he replied, silence — by keeping silent with men in order to speak with God — and the union I have maintained with my Lord, in whom I have found, and find, all my peace. Such, in sum, was this poor man through the union he had with the divine will; he was certainly in his poverty richer than all the monarchs of the earth, and in his sufferings happier than all the worldly with their earthly delights.

Oh, what great folly it is in those who resist the divine will! They must suffer their trials in any case, for no one can ever prevent the divine decrees from being carried out. Voluntati ejus quis resistet? (Rom 9.19) And at the same time they must suffer without fruit — indeed, drawing upon themselves greater punishments in the next life, and greater unrest in this one. Quis restitit ei, et pacem habuit? (Job 24) Let that sick man cry out as much as he likes in his pains; let that poor man lament against God in his miseries, rage, and blaspheme as he pleases — what will he gain but to double his suffering? Quid quaeris homuncio quaerendo bona? (says St. Augustine) quare unum bonum, in quo sunt omnia bona. What are you seeking, poor little man, outside your God? Find God, unite yourself, bind yourself to his will, and you will live forever happy in this life and the next.

And what else, after all, does our God want but our good? Whom can we ever find who loves us more than God? His will is none other than that no one should perish, but that all should be saved and made saints. Nolens aliquos perire, sed omnes ad poenitentiam reverti. (2 Petr. 3.9) Voluntas Dei sanctificatio vestra. (1 Thess. 4.3) God has placed his glory in our good, for being by his nature infinite goodness, as St. Leo says, Deus cujus natura bonitas; and since goodness by its nature desires to diffuse itself, God has a supreme desire to make souls share in his goods and in his happiness. And if he sends us tribulations in this life, they are all for our good. Omnia cooperantur in bonum. (ad Rom. 8.28) Even punishments, as the holy Judith said, do not come from God for our ruin, but so that we may amend and be saved: Ad emendationem, non ad perditionem nostram evenisse credamus. (Jud. 8.17) The Lord, in order to save us from eternal evils, surrounds us with his good will. Domine ut scuto bonae voluntatis tuae coronasti nos. (Ps 5.1) He not only desires but is solicitous for our salvation. Deus solicitus est mei. (Ps. 29.18) And what has he given but his own Son? Qui proprio Filio suo non pepercit, sed pro nobis omnibus tradidit illum; quomodo non etiam cum illo omnia nobis donavit? (Rom 8.32) With this confidence, then, we must abandon ourselves to the divine dispositions, which are all for our good. Let us say always, in everything that happens to us: In pace in idipsum dormiam, et requiescam, quoniam tu, Domine, singulariter in spe constituisti me. (Ps 4) Let us place ourselves entirely in his hands, for he will certainly take care of us: Omnem sollicitudinem vestram projicientes in eum, quoniam ipsi cura est de vobis. (1 Petr. 5.7) Let us think of God, of fulfilling his will, and he will think of us and of our good. Daughter (said the Lord to St. Catherine of Siena), think of me, and I will always think of you. Let us often say with the sacred Spouse: Dilectus meus mihi, et ego illi. (Cant. 2.6) My Beloved thinks of my good; I wish to think of nothing else but pleasing him and conforming myself in all things to his holy will. The holy Abbot Nilus used to say that we should not pray to the Lord to make things happen as we wish, but that his will be fulfilled in us. And when adverse things happen to us, let us accept them all from the divine hands, not only with patience but with gladness, after the example of the Apostles, qui ibant gaudentes a conspectu concilii, quoniam digni habiti sunt pro nomine Jesu contumeliam pati. (Act 5.41) And what greater joy can a soul have than, when suffering some trial, to know that by suffering it willingly, it gives the greatest pleasure to God that it can give him! The masters of the spiritual life say that although God appreciates the desire that some souls have to suffer in order to please him, he is even more pleased by the uniformity of those who wish neither to enjoy nor to suffer, but being wholly resigned to his holy will, desire nothing other than to fulfill what he wills.

If you wish, then, O devout soul, to please God and to live on this earth a contented life, unite yourself always and in all things to the divine will. Consider that all the sins of the disordered and bitter life you have lived have come about because you departed from the will of God. Embrace from this day forward the divine good pleasure, and say always in all that happens to you: Ita Pater, quoniam sic fuit placitum ante te. (Matt. 11.16) So, Lord, let it be done, because so it has pleased you. When you feel troubled by some adverse event, think that it has come from God; and immediately say, God wills it so, and set yourself at peace. Obmutui, et non aperui os meum, quoniam tu fecisti. (Ps 38) Lord, since you have done it, I will not speak, and I accept it. To this end you must direct all your thoughts and your prayers — that is, to strive always, and always to pray God in meditation, in Communion, in visits to the Blessed Sacrament, to make you fulfill his will. And offer yourself always, saying: My God, here I am — do with me and with all that is mine whatever you wish. This was the continual exercise of St. Teresa; at least fifty times a day the Saint offered herself to the Lord, so that he might dispose of her as he pleased.

Oh, blessed are you, my reader, if you always do this! You will certainly become a saint, and you will have a contented life and a still happier death. When someone passes to the other life, all the hope one conceives for his salvation comes from knowing whether he died resigned or not. If you, as you have embraced in life all the things that came from God, also embrace death in order to fulfill his divine will, you will certainly be saved and die a saint. Let us abandon ourselves, then, in all things to the good pleasure of that Lord, who, being most wise, and having given his life for our love, also wills what is best for us. Let us be sure and persuaded, says St. Basil, that God provides for our good incomparably better than we could ever do or desire for ourselves.

But let us come to see in practice in which things we are to conform ourselves to God's will. First, we must conform ourselves in natural things that happen outside of us, such as when there is great heat, great cold, rain, famine, pestilence, and the like. Let us take care not to say: What unbearable heat! What horrible cold! What misfortune! What bad luck! What wretched times! — or other expressions that show resistance to God's will. We must will everything as it is, because God is the one who disposes all things. St. Francis Borgia, going one night to a house of the Society while it was snowing, knocked many times, but because the Fathers were asleep, the door was not opened to him. When day broke, those Fathers were very sorry to have made him wait out in the open that way; but the Saint said he had received a great consolation during that time, thinking that God was the one casting those snowflakes upon him.

Second, we must conform ourselves in things that happen within us, such as suffering hunger, thirst, poverty, desolations, and dishonor. In everything we must always say: Lord, do and undo as you will — I am content; I wish only what you wish. And thus, as Fr. Rodriguez also says, we should respond to those imaginary cases the devil sometimes puts into our mind to make us fall into some evil consent, or at least to trouble us. If such a person said such a word to you, if he did such a thing, what would you say? What would you do? Let us always answer: I would say and do whatever God wills. And thus we will free ourselves from every defect and disturbance.

Third, if we have some natural defect, of soul or body — a bad memory, a slow mind, little ability, a crippled limb, weak health — let us not complain. What merit did we have, and what obligation did God have, to give us a more sublime mind, a better-formed body? Could he not have created us ugly? Could he not have left us in our nothingness? Who receives a gift and goes looking for conditions? Let us thank him, then, for what he has given us by his pure goodness, and let us be content with how he has made us. Who knows whether, had we greater talent, stronger health, a more pleasing appearance, we might have lost our souls? For how many has their talent and knowledge been an occasion of perdition, through becoming vain and despising others! — a danger more readily faced by those who surpass others in learning and talent. For how many others has the beauty or strength of the body been an occasion of falling into a thousand crimes? And on the other hand, how many others, by being poor, or sick, or ill-favored in appearance, have become saints and been saved — who, had they been rich, healthy, or handsome, would have been damned? And so let us be content with what God has given us. Porro unum est necessarium. (Luc 10.42) Beauty is not necessary, nor health, nor a keen mind; only to save our souls is necessary.

Fourth, we must be especially resigned in bodily illnesses, and we must embrace them willingly, in that manner and for that length of time that God wills. We should indeed use ordinary remedies, because this too the Lord wills; but if they do not help, let us unite ourselves with the will of God, which will benefit us far more than health. Lord, let us say then, I do not wish to get well nor to remain sick — I wish only what you wish. Certainly it is greater virtue in illness not to complain of one's pains; but when these afflict us strongly, it is no fault to reveal them to friends, and even to ask the Lord to free us from them. I mean in great pains, for on the other hand, some are very much at fault in this, who at every simple pain or discomfort would have the whole world come to pity them and weep around them. For the rest, even Jesus Christ, seeing himself near his most bitter passion, revealed his distress to his disciples: Tristis est anima mea usque ad mortem. (Mat. 26.38) And he asked his eternal Father to free him from it: Pater mi, si possibilie est, transeat a me calix iste. (ibid 39) But Jesus himself taught us what we must do after such prayers — that is, to resign ourselves immediately to the divine will, by adding: Verumtamen, non sicut ego volo, sed sicut tu.

What foolishness it is, then, in those who say they desire health not in order to avoid suffering, but to serve the Lord better — to observe the rule, serve the community, go to Church, receive Communion, do penance, study, devote themselves to the salvation of souls through hearing confessions or preaching! But I ask you, my devout one: tell me, why do you wish to do these things? To please God? Then what are you seeking, when you are certain that God's pleasure is not that you pray, receive Communions, do penances, study, or preach — but that you suffer with patience that illness and those pains he sends you? Unite your sufferings then with those of Jesus Christ. But it grieves me, you say, that being so ill I am useless and a burden to the community, to the house. But just as you resign yourself to the will of God, so you must believe that your Superiors also resign themselves, seeing that it is not out of your laziness, but by God's will, that you bring this burden to the house. Alas, these desires and laments do not spring from love of God, but from self-love, which goes seeking pretexts to draw you away from the will of God. Do we wish to please God? Then let us say, when we find ourselves confined to a bed, this single word to the Lord: fiat voluntas tua; and let us repeat it always, a hundred and a thousand times — for with this alone we would please God more than we would with all the mortifications and devotions we could perform. There is no better way to serve God than to embrace his will joyfully. The Venerable Fr. Master Avila (Epist.2) wrote to an ailing priest: Friend, do not busy yourself reckoning what you would do if you were well, but be content to be ill for as long as it pleases God. If you seek the will of God, what does it matter more to you to be well than to be ill? And he certainly spoke well, for God is not glorified by our works, but by our resignation and conformity to his holy will. For this reason St. Francis de Sales also used to say that one serves God more by suffering than by working.

Often we will lack doctors, medicines, or else the doctor will fail to understand our illness, and in this too we must conform ourselves to the divine will, which disposes this for our good. It is told of a man devoted to St. Thomas of Canterbury (l. 5, c. 1) that, being ill, he went to the tomb of the Saint to obtain his health. He returned cured to his homeland, but then said to himself: But if illness would better serve my salvation, what use is this health? With this thought he returned to the tomb and prayed to the Saint to ask God for whatever was most expedient for his eternal salvation; and having done so, he fell ill again, and he remained perfectly content, holding it for certain that God disposed thus for his good. Surius similarly tells of a blind man who received his sight through the intercession of St. Vedast the Bishop; but then he prayed that if that sight was not expedient for his soul, he should become blind again — and having prayed, he remained blind as before. When we are ill, then, the best course is not to seek either illness or health, but to abandon ourselves to the will of God, so that he may dispose of us as he pleases. But if we wish to seek health, let us at least always ask for it with resignation and with the condition that bodily health be compatible with the salvation of the soul; otherwise such a prayer will be defective and will not be heard, for the Lord does not grant prayers that are not resigned.

The time of illness I call the touchstone of spirits, because then it is discovered of what quality is the virtue a soul possesses. If that soul is not troubled, does not complain, does not make demands, but obeys the doctors and the Superiors, and remains tranquil, wholly resigned to the divine will, it is a sign that genuine virtue is there. But what must be said of a sick person who complains, and says he is poorly attended by others, that his pains are unbearable, that he finds no remedy that helps, that the doctor is ignorant — and at times even complains against God, that he presses too hard? St. Bonaventure recounts in the life of St. Francis (cap. 14) that when the Saint was extraordinarily tormented by pain, one of his friars, too simple in his manner, said to him: Father, pray God to treat you a little more gently, for it seems he presses too hard. Hearing this, St. Francis gave a cry and answered him: Listen — if I did not know that what you say comes from simplicity, I would not wish to see you again, for you have dared to criticize the judgments of God. And having said this, though very weak and exhausted by his illness, he threw himself from the bed to the ground, and kissing it, said: Lord, I thank you for all the pains you send me. I beg you to send me a hundred times more, if it so pleases you. My delight is that you afflict me, and spare me not at all, for the fulfillment of your will is the greatest consolation I can receive in this life.

To this point we must also bring the loss we sometimes suffer of persons useful to us for our benefit, whether temporal or spiritual. Devout souls often commit great faults on this point, by not resigning themselves to the divine dispositions. Our sanctification is not to come from spiritual fathers, but from God. He indeed wills that we make use of directors for the guidance of the spirit when he gives them to us; but when he takes them from us, he wills that we be content and increase our confidence in his goodness, saying then: Lord, you gave me this help, and now you have taken it away — may your will always be done; but now supply it yourself, and teach me what I must do to serve you. And in like manner we must accept from the hands of God all the other crosses he sends us. But so many trials, you say, are punishments. But I answer: the punishments that God sends in this life — are they not graces and blessings? If we have offended him, we must satisfy divine justice in some way, either in this life or in the next. Therefore we must all say with St. Augustine: Hic ure, hic seca, hic non parcas, ut in aeternum parcas: and with holy Job: Haec sit mihi consolatio, ut affligens me dolore non parcas. (6.10) He who has deserved Hell should indeed be consoled to see that God punishes him here, for this should greatly encourage him to hope that God wishes to spare him the eternal punishment. Let us say, then, amid God's punishments, what the priest Eli said: Dominus est, quod bonum est in oculis suis, faciat. (Lib 2 Reg. 3.18)

Furthermore, we must be resigned in spiritual desolations. It is the Lord's custom, when a soul gives itself to the spiritual life, to flood it with consolations, in order to wean it from the pleasures of the world; but then, when he sees it more firmly established in the spirit, he withdraws his hand, to test its love and see whether it serves and loves him without the payment of sensible delights here on earth. While we live (said St. Teresa), the gain does not consist in seeking to enjoy God more, but in doing his will. And in another place: The love of God does not consist in tenderness, but in serving with courage and humility. And elsewhere: With dryness and temptations the Lord tests his lovers. Let the soul, then, thank the Lord when it finds itself caressed with sweetness, but it must not afflict itself with impatience when it finds itself left in desolation. This point must be carefully noted, for some foolish souls, seeing themselves in dryness, imagine that God has abandoned them, or that the spiritual life is not for them; and so they leave prayer and lose everything they have gained. There is no better time to exercise our resignation to the will of God than the time of aridity. I do not say that you should not feel pain at finding yourself left without the sensible presence of your God; such pain cannot not be felt; nor can the soul not lament, when our Redeemer himself lamented on the cross: Deus meus, ut quid dereliquisti me? (Matt. 22.46) But in its pain it must always resign itself entirely to the will of its Lord. All the Saints have suffered these desolations and spiritual abandonments. What hardness of heart is this that I feel (said St. Bernard) — I no longer taste the reading, meditation no longer pleases me, nor prayer! For the most part the Saints have lived in aridity, not in sensible consolations. These the Lord grants only rarely, and to spirits perhaps weaker, so that they do not stop on the spiritual way. The delights that are our reward he prepares for us in Paradise. This earth is a place of merit, where we merit by suffering; heaven is the place of reward and of enjoyment. Therefore on this earth it is not sensible fervor with enjoyment, but the fervor of the spirit with suffering, that the Saints have desired and sought. The Venerable John of Avila said (Audi fil. c. 26): Oh, how much better it is to remain in dryness and temptation with the will of God, than in contemplation without it!

But you will say: If I knew that this desolation came from God, I would remain content; but what afflicts and troubles me is the fear that it comes through my own fault, and as a punishment for my tepidity. Very well; then remove the tepidity and practice greater diligence. But perhaps because you are in darkness, you wish therefore to grow restless, to leave prayer, and thus make your evil double? Let the aridity come as a punishment, as you say. But this punishment — does God not send it to you? Accept it, then, as a punishment well deserved, and bind yourself to the divine will. Do you not say that you deserve Hell? And now why do you complain? Perhaps you deserve to be consoled by God? Come now, be content with however God treats you; continue your prayer and the path you have undertaken, and henceforth fear that your complaints come from lack of humility and lack of resignation to the will of God. When a soul goes to prayer, there is no greater profit it can draw from it than to unite itself to the divine will; therefore resign yourself and say: Lord, I accept this suffering from your hands, and I accept it for as long as it pleases you; if you wish me to remain thus afflicted for all eternity, I am content. And so that prayer, though painful, will benefit you more than any sweetest consolation.

But we must keep in mind that aridity is not always a punishment, but sometimes a disposition of God for our greater profit, and to preserve us in humility. Lest St. Paul grow vain over the gifts he had received, the Lord permitted him to be tormented by temptations against purity. Ne magnitudo revelationum extollat me, datus est mihi stimulus carnis meae, Angelus Sathanae, qui me colaphizet. (1 Cor. 17.7) He who prays with sweetness does nothing great. Est amicus socius mensae, et non permanebit in die necessitatis. (Eccl. 6.10) You would not consider as a true friend one who only accompanies you at your table, but one who stands by you in your troubles, and without profit to himself. When God sends darkness and desolation, then he tests his true friends. Palladius suffered great weariness in prayer; he went to find St. Macarius, who told him: When the thought tells you to leave prayer, answer it: I, for the love of Jesus Christ, am content to stay here guarding the walls of this cell. This, then, is the response when you feel tempted to leave prayer because it seems you are wasting time — say then: I remain here to please God. St. Francis de Sales used to say that if in prayer we did nothing else but drive away distractions and temptations, the prayer is still well made. Indeed, Tauler says that God will grant a greater grace to one who perseveres in prayer with aridity than if he had prayed much with great sensible devotion. Fr. Rodriguez tells of a certain man who said that in forty years of prayer he had never experienced any consolation, but that on the days he prayed, he felt himself strong in the virtues; whereas when he omitted it, on that day he experienced such weakness that it rendered him unfit for every good thing. St. Bonaventure and Gerson say that many serve God more by not having the recollection they desire than if they had it, because in this way they live more diligently and more humbled; otherwise they would perhaps grow vain and become more lukewarm, thinking they had already found what they were seeking. And what is said of aridity is said also of temptations. We must strive to avoid temptations; but if God wills or permits that we be tempted against faith, against purity, or against any other virtue, we must not complain, but in this too resign ourselves to the divine will. To St. Paul who prayed to be freed from the temptation of impurity, the Lord replied: sufficit tibi gratia mea. And so we too, if we see that God does not hear us in exempting us from some troublesome temptation, let us say: Lord, do and permit what you please; your grace is enough for me — but help me, that I may never lose it. It is not temptations, but consent to temptation, that makes us lose the divine grace. When we drive away temptations, they keep us more humble, gain us more merit, make us turn more often to God, and thus keep us farther from offending him, and unite us more closely to his holy love.

Finally, we must unite ourselves with God's will on the point of our death, and for that time and in that manner in which God will send it. St. Gertrude (l. 1. Vita c. 11), climbing a hill one day, slipped and fell into a valley. When her companions later asked if she had been afraid of dying without the Sacraments, the Saint replied: I very much desire to die with the Sacraments, but I esteem the will of God more, for I hold the best disposition one can have for a good death to be submission to whatever God may will. Therefore I desire whatever death it pleases my Lord to give me. St. Gregory in his Dialogues (l. 3. c.37) tells that the Vandals, having condemned a certain priest named Santolus to death, gave him leave to choose whatever kind of death he wished. The holy man refused to choose, but said: I am in the hands of God, and I will receive the death that he permits you to make me suffer — I wish no other than that. This act so pleased the Lord that, though those barbarians had determined to have his head cut off, he made the executioner's arm stop still, and by this miracle they were moved to spare his life. As for the manner, then, we should esteem as the best death for us that which God has determined for us. Save us, Lord (let us always say when we think of our death), and then let us die as you please.

In the same way we must conform ourselves to the when of our death. What is this earth but a prison where we must suffer, and in danger of losing God at every moment? This made David cry out: Educ de custodia animam meam. (Ps. 141.8) This fear made St. Teresa sigh for death, and when the clock sounded, she was greatly consoled, thinking that an hour of her life had passed — an hour of danger of losing God. Fr. Master Avila used to say that everyone who is in a state of moderate readiness should desire death, on account of the danger in which one lives of losing divine grace. What could be dearer or more desirable than to secure by a single death the impossibility of ever losing the grace of our God? But I, you say, have done nothing yet; I have gained nothing for my soul. But if God wills that you end your life now, what would you gain by living on against the will of God? And who knows whether, changing your will, you would fall into other sins and damn yourself? And besides, if nothing else, you cannot live without sins, at least light ones. Cur (thus exclaimed St. Bernard) cur vitam desideramus, in qua quanto amplius vivimus, tanto plus peccamus? (Med. c.8) And it is certain that a single venial sin displeases God more than all the holy works we could ever do please him.

I say more: he who little desires Paradise gives a sign of little love for God. He who loves desires the presence of the beloved; but we cannot see God unless we leave the earth; and therefore all the Saints have sighed for death, to go and see their beloved Lord. Thus sighed St. Augustine: Eja moriar, ut te videam. Thus St. Paul: Desiderium habens dissolvi, et esse cum Christo. (ad Philip. 1.28) Thus David: Quando veniam et apparebo ante faciem Dei? (Psal. 41.3) And thus all souls in love with God. An author (Flores Enrel. Graul. 4. c. 68) relates that a knight, going hunting one day in a forest, heard a man sweetly singing; he drew near and found a poor leper, half rotted away. He asked him if it was he who was singing. Yes, replied the leper, it is I, sir, who was singing. And how can you sing and be content with so many pains that are taking your life? The leper answered: Between God my Lord and me there is nothing else in the way but this wall of mud, which is this body of mine. Once this impediment is removed, I shall go to enjoy my God. And seeing that every day it is crumbling apart piece by piece, I rejoice and sing.

Lastly, in the degrees of grace and glory, too, we must conform ourselves to the divine will. We should indeed esteem the things that pertain to God's glory, but we should esteem his will even more. We must desire to love him more than the Seraphim, but we must not then wish for any degree of love other than that which the Lord has determined to give us. Fr. Master Avila says (Audi filia c.12): I do not believe there has been a Saint who did not desire to be better than he was; but this did not deprive them of their peace, because they did not desire it out of personal ambition, but for God — with whose distribution they remained content, even if he had given them less, esteeming it a truer love to be content with what God gave them than to desire to have much. Which is to say, as Fr. Rodriguez explains (trat. 8. c. 30), that although we must be diligent in striving for perfection as much as we can — lest our own lukewarmness and laziness serve as an excuse, as some do who say: God must give it to me; I cannot do more than so much — nevertheless, when we do fall short, we must not lose our peace or our conformity to God's will in having permitted our fault, nor lose heart. Let us rise immediately from it, humbling ourselves with repentance and seeking greater help from the Lord, and continue on our way. Likewise, although we may well desire to reach the choir of the Seraphim in heaven, for greater glory to God and to love him more, we must nonetheless resign ourselves to his holy will, being content with whatever degree he deigns to give us by his mercy.

It would be a grievous fault indeed to desire supernatural gifts of prayer, and especially ecstasies, visions, and revelations; rather, the masters of the spiritual life say that those souls who are favored by God with such graces ought to pray him to take them away, so that they may love him by the way of pure faith, which is the surest way. Many have reached perfection without these supernatural graces. The virtues alone are what raise souls to holiness, and principally uniformity with the will of God. And if God does not wish to raise us to a sublime degree of perfection and glory, let us conform ourselves in all things to his holy will, praying him to save us at least by his mercy. And doing so, the reward that our good Lord will give us for his goodness will not be small — for he loves above all things resigned souls.

In sum, we must regard all things that happen to us and will happen to us as proceeding from the divine hands. And we must direct all our actions to this single end: to do the will of God, and to do them only because God wills them. And to proceed more safely in this, we must depend on the guidance of our Superiors in external matters, and on our Directors in internal matters, to learn from them what God wants of us — having great faith in the words of Jesus Christ, who said to us: Qui vos audit, me audit. (Luc. 10.16) And above all let us devote ourselves to serving God in the way that God wishes to be served by us. I say this so that we may avoid the error of some who waste their time feeding on thoughts like: If I were in a desert, if I entered a monastery, if I went somewhere else away from this house, far from these relatives or companions, I would make myself a saint, I would do such penances, I would pray so much. He says: I would do, I would do; but in the meantime, suffering with ill will the cross that God sends him, and not walking by the way that God wills, he does not become holy — indeed he goes from bad to worse. These desires are sometimes temptations of the devil, since they are not according to the will of God; therefore we must drive them away and take heart to serve the Lord on that sole road he has chosen for us. By doing his will, we will certainly become saints in whatever state the Lord places us. Let us, then, always will only what God wills, and in doing so he will press us to his heart. And to this end let us make familiar to ourselves certain passages of Scripture that invite us to unite ourselves ever more closely to the divine will. Domine, quid me vis facere? My God, tell me what you want of me, and I wish to do it all, absolutely all. Tuus sum ego, salvum me fac. (Ps. 18.94) I am no longer my own; I am yours, O my Lord — do with me whatever you wish. When some heavier adversity befalls us especially — death of relatives, loss of goods, and the like — Ita Pater (let us always say), ita Pater, quoniam sic fuit placitum ante te. (Matt. 11.26) Yes, my God and my Father, so be it done, because so it has pleased you. Above all let us hold dear the prayer taught us by Jesus Christ: Fiat voluntas tua sicut in caelo, et in terra. The Lord said to St. Catherine of Genoa that whenever she said the Pater noster, she should pause particularly on these words, praying that his holy will be fulfilled in her with the same perfection with which the Saints do it in heaven. Let us do likewise, and we will certainly become saints.