Chapter LIX. Of Sensible Devotion and of Dryness

SENSIBLE devotion arises sometimes from nature, sometimes from the devil, and sometimes from grace. You will be able from its fruits to discern its source; since if it does not produce amendment of life, your only doubt will be, whether it proceeds from the devil, or from nature; and especially, if it is accompanied by a greater relish and sweetness, and attachment, and a certain self-esteem.

When, therefore, you shall feel your mind filled with spiritual sweetness, do not stop to dispute about the source from whence it comes; and do not lean upon it, nor suffer yourself to be taken off from the thought of your own nothingness; but with greater diligence and hatred of self, study to keep your heart free from all attachment, even to spiritual things, and seek God alone, and His good pleasure; for in this way the delight—whether it spring from nature or from the devil—will be changed into an effect of grace to you.

Dryness may likewise proceed from these three causes.

From the devil, to make the mind lukewarm, and to cause it to turn from spiritual exertion to the occupations and delights of the world.

From ourselves, through our faults, earthly attachments, and neglects.

From grace, either to give us warning, that we should be more diligent to forsake every attachment and employment which is not of God, and does not terminate in Him; or, to make us learn by experience, that all our good things come from Him; or, that we may for the future more highly esteem His gifts, and be more humble and cautious in preserving them; or, that we may unite ourselves more closely to His Divine Majesty with entire self-renunciation even as to spiritual delights, that our affections may not be so attached to them as to divide the heart which the Lord would have wholly for Himself; or else, because He is pleased to see us put forth all our strength in battle, and use His grace.

If you then should feel dry, enter into yourself, that you may discover from what fault of your own you have been deprived of sensible devotion; and against it make war, not with the motive of recovering a consciousness of grace, but in order that you may remove what is displeasing to God.

And if you cannot find out the fault, let your sensible devotion be true devotion, which is prompt resignation to the Will of God. But on no account leave off any of your devotions, but pursue them with all your might, however fruitless and distasteful they may appear to you; drinking willingly the cup of bitterness, which in this dryness the loving Will of God holds out to you.

And if at times dryness is accompanied with such great and thick darkness of mind, that you neither know which way to turn, nor what step to take, yet be not dismayed, remain alone and firm upon the Cross, far from every earthly delight, even though it should be offered you by the world or by any creature.

Conceal your suffering from every one except your spiritual father, and disclose it to him, not with a view of alleviating pain, but in order to learn how to bear it according to God's pleasure.

Let Communion, prayer, and other exercises be used, not that you may come down from the cross, but to receive the strength to exalt that cross to the greater glory of the Crucified. And when you are unable to meditate, through confusion of mind, and cannot pray as usual, meditate as best you can. And what you cannot accomplish with the understanding, make a violent effort to effect with the will and with words, holding converse with yourself, and with your Lord; for this will have wonderful effects, and thus your heart will gain breath and strength.

You can then in such a case say: "Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted within me? hope thou in God: for I shall yet praise Him, Who is the health of my countenance, and my God." "Why standest Thou so far off, O Lord, and hidest Thy Face in the needful time of trouble? Forsake me not utterly."

And remembering the sacred teaching which God imparted in time of tribulation to His beloved Sarah, the wife of Tobias, make use of it also, and say aloud: "But whoso serveth Thee knows assuredly, that his life, if passed in trial, will be crowned; if in tribulation, will be freed; and if in chastisement, he may fly to Thy Mercy. For Thou delightest not in our destruction; for Thou makest a calm to succeed a storm, and after tears and weeping, Thou infusest joy. Be Thy Name, O God of Israel, blessed for ever!" Tob. iii.

You will remember also your Christ, Who, in the Garden and on the Cross, was, to His great pain, abandoned by His Heavenly Father, as far as the feeling of comfort was concerned; and, bearing the cross with Him, with all your heart say, "Thy Will be done." By doing so, your patience and prayer will raise the flame of your heart's sacrifice into the presence of God, leaving you truly devout; true devotion (as I have said to you) consisting in a lively and firm readiness of will to follow Christ with the cross on your shoulder, by whatever way He invites and calls us to Himself, to desire God for God, and at times to leave God for God.

And if by this, and not by devotional feelings, many persons (and especially women), who aim at a spiritual life, would measure their progress, they would not be deceived by themselves nor by the devil, nor would they uselessly, or rather ungratefully, complain of so much good which the Lord has done them; but they would strive with greater earnestness to serve His Divine Majesty, Who disposes and permits all things for His Glory, and our good.

And here, again, do women deceive themselves, who guard themselves with fear and prudence from every occasion of sin; but when at times they are molested by horrible, filthy, and fearful thoughts, and also sometimes by most loathsome visions, they are confounded, and lose heart, and make themselves believe that they are forsaken by, and wholly banished from God, and cannot persuade themselves that the Holy Spirit can abide in a mind filled with such thoughts.

Thus, continuing much cast down, they are ready to despair, and, having left all their good exercises, to return to Egypt.

They do not well understand what grace the Lord bestows on them; for He suffers such persons to be assailed by these spirits of temptation, to bring them back to the knowledge of themselves, and in order that, by feeling their need of Him, they may draw near to Him.

Therefore they ungratefully complain of that, for which they ought to feel themselves indebted to His infinite Goodness.

What you ought to do in such cases is, to bring yourself low by the consideration of your perverse inclinations, which, God wills for your good that you should know, are prone to every sin, even the most grievous; and that, without His succour, you would rush to utter ruin.

And from this enter into a state of hope and confidence, and gather that He is ready to help you, since He makes you see the danger, and wishes to draw you nearer to Himself by prayer and by recourse to Him; for this, therefore, you ought to render Him most humble thanks. And be assured that such spirits of temptation and filthy thoughts are better banished by a patient endurance of the pain, and by dexterous diversion of the mind, than by a too anxious resistance.