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Chapter II

Of nine sorts of false peace; of defective love and fallacious prayer. This chapter contains very important teaching on genuine love, and on how souls should examine themselves so as to discover the defects that hinder them from attaining the perfection they desire.

never remain long in His service. As soon as the evil one notices it, he flatters their humour again, and so regains their friendship, until he holds them fast in the place where they learn how false was his peace. But it is needless to speak of such persons — let them enjoy their tranquillity — and I trust in God that no such harm will be found among you.

  1. The devil may give us another kind of peace respecting insignificant defects, and we must fear him, daughters, as long as we live. When a nun begins to grow lax about what appear to be in themselves unimportant things, and feels no remorse of conscience after some time, this is an evil peace, and Satan may bring her to a very wicked peacefulness.

  2. Such is the breach of some Constitution, which in itself is no sin, or carelessness in obeying the orders of a superior who is the representative of God, for we came here prepared to respect her wishes. There are other little matters which do not seem to be sinful, but which are imperfections. Such things must occur, because of the miseries of our nature: I do not deny this, but I say that we ought to be sorry for them and to know that we have done wrong; otherwise the devil may bestir himself and gradually make the soul insensible to these small defects, and when he succeeds in this, I assure you, my daughters, that he has gained no small victory, and I fear he will not stop there.

  3. For the love of God, watch yourselves very carefully. There must be war in this life, for we cannot sit with our hands folded among so many enemies, but must keep constant watch over both our outward and inward conduct. I assure you that even though our Lord may grant you favours during prayer, of which I shall speak later on, yet at other times there will be no lack of a thousand little stumbling-blocks and chances, such as breaking a rule through carelessness, not performing some duty as well as might be, besides internal troubles and temptations. I do not say this must always be the case, nor that it is very usual. Still, it is a signal mercy from our Lord when such trials occur1 and the soul makes progress by their means. We cannot be angels in this world, for it is not our nature.

  4. Therefore I do not feel alarmed at seeing a soul greatly tempted, which will benefit it if it has the fear and love of our Lord, for I know it will come out with great gain. When I see anyone, like some people I have met, always calm and never meeting with any conflict, although I do not witness her oñend God, yet I always feel misgivings about her, and, since the devil leaves her alone, I try to prove her in every possible way, so that she may discover what she really is. I have rarely known such cases, yet it is possible for the soul which God has raised to a high degree of contemplation to be in such a state, and enjoy constant interior happiness. For my part I do not believe that their case is thoroughly understood, and on investigating the matter, I have found that they have their little struggles at times, although not frequently. I have weighed the matter carefully, and I do not envy such persons, for I find others advance far more who sustain the combats that I have described, although their prayer is not such, in point of perfection, as we should expect it to be here.

  5. I do not allude to those who have attained great holiness and mortification by their long years of warfare; they have died to the world, and our Lord usually gives peace, which, however, does not prevent their perceiving and grieving deeply over their faults. God guides souls in many different ways, daughters, yet I am always sorry when you feel no sorrow for any fault you have committed, for you ought to take to heart every sin, even a venial one, as, glory be to God, I believe and see that you do.

  6. Notice one thing, and remember it for love of me. If a person is alive, however slightly you prick her with a needle or with a little thorn, the most slender you can find, does she not feel it? Now, if the soul is not dead, but has a living love for God, is it not a great grace from Him that she should feel pained at the least infringement of the vows she has taken or the obligations she is under?; Oh! is not the heart in which God implants such solicitude prepared by Him as a couch of flowers to which He cannot choose but come and delight Himself, long though His delay may be?

  7. Alas, O my God! Why are we nuns in our convent? Why did we leave the world? For what did we come? How can we better spend our time than in preparing within our souls a dwelling-place for our Bridegroom, that we may be able to ask Him to " kiss us with the kiss of His mouth "? Blessed will she be who makes this petition, whose lamp shall not have gone out when the Lord comes and who need not return to her home after having knocked.* O my daughters, in how high a state are we placed! No one can prevent our saying these words to our Spouse, for we became His brides when we made our profession.

  8. Let scrupulous persons understand that I have not been speaking of an occasional fault, or of failings that cannot always be known or regretted; I allude to a religious who habitually commits faults and takes no notice of them, thinking they are of no consequence, and who neither repents nor tries to amend them. I say once more that such a peace is dangerous, therefore beware of it. What, then, will become of those who are very lax about their Rule? God grant there may be none of this kind among us! Doubtless, the devil often gives such peace, and God permits it as a punishment for our sins, but there

2 See Poem 13. is no need to discuss it here, as I only wished to give you a word of warning.

  1. We will now consider the peace which our Lord begins to grant us in prayer; of this I will tell you as much as His Majesty shall be pleased to make me understand. On reflection, I think it best to say something here about the peace given by the world, and that produced by our sensuality, for though it has been far better written about elsewhere, you may be too poor to buy the books, and perhaps no one will give them to you, but these writings will be kept in the convent and will contain both subjects.

  2. We may be misled in many ways by worldly peace: from those I shall describe you may divine the rest. For instance — some people have all they require for their needs, besides a large sum of money shut up in their safe as well, but as they avoid mortal sin, they think they have done their duty. They enjoy their riches and give an occasional alms, yet never consider that their property is not their own, but that God has entrusted it to them as His stewards for the good of the poor, and that they will have to render a strict account of the time they kept it shut up in their money chests, if the poor have suffered from want on account of their hoarding and delay. We have no concern with this, except to ask God to enlighten such people lest they meet with the fate of the rich miser,'2 and to thank Him for making us poor, which we should hold as a special favour on His part. O my daughters! what a solace to be free from such burdens, even as regards this world's tranquillity,3 and it is impossible to imagine what a difference it will make to us at the last day. The rich are slaves, while you are rulers: as a comparison will show. Which is the more at ease, the gentleman who finds his meals set ready for him or his steward who has to render an account of every maravedí? The former enjoys his goods without counting the cost, but the burden falls on the poor steward's shoulders, and the greater the wealth, the heavier the responsibility. How often he must lose his sleep, especially when the time of reckoning comes, particularly if he has to balance up for several years, and has been more or less careless in the past. Then, if there is a large deficit, I cannot think how he can feel any peace.

  3. Read no further, daughters, without first thanking God very heartily. Be more strict than ever in your custom of holding no personal property. We are contented to eat whatever our Lord provides, and as He will let us want for nothing," we need not be anxious about superfluities. His Majesty has taken good care that we should possess nothing we might feel constrained to give away. The principal point is, daughters, that we should be satisfied with little; we ought not to want anything for which we should be bound to render a strict account, as a rich man must, even though his money is not in his own care, but in that of his major-domo. And what a strict reckoning that will be! If only he realised it, he would not enjoy his luxurious meals so much, nor squander his means in useless and frivolous ways. As for you, my daughters, always try to be as poor as you can, both in your food and clothing, otherwise you will cheat yourselves, for God will not give you more, so you will remain unsatisfied. Always endeavour not to take the food of the poor without having served His Majesty,® although all that you can do will be but a scanty return to God for the peace and rest which He bestows on you because you will have to render no account of riches. I know that you understand this, but you must from time to time render special thanks to Him on this account.

  4. It is needless for me to warn you against the earthly peace which comes from honours, because the poor never meet with much honour. However, unless you are careful, praise from others may harm you greatly, for when once it begins it never ceases, and generally ends in running you down afterwards. This usually takes the form of telling you that you are more holy than others, and such-like flattering speeches which seem to have been inspired by the devil. Indeed, they must be, sometimes, for if they were said in your absence it would not matter, but when uttered in your hearing, what other fruit can they produce but evil, unless you are most wary?

  5. For the love of God, I implore you never to find your peace in such speeches, for they might gradually do you so much mischief that at last you would come to believe them, or to think you had done all you need, and that your work was finished. Never let such things be said of you without strongly repudiating them; you can easily do this if you make it your constant practice. Remember how the world treated our Lord Jesus Christ, yet how it had extolled Him on Palm Sunday! Men so esteemed St. John Baptist as to mistake him for the Messiah, yet how barbarously and for what a motive they

' Way of Perf., ch. ii. 5. afterwards beheaded him! Never does the world exalt any of the children of God, save to dash them down again!

  1. I know this well by experience. I used to regret that people praised me so blindly, but now I laugh as at the words of a madman. Remember your sins, and that, even if there is some truth in what is told you, the good is not your own, but you are only under an obligation of serving God more strictly.* Dread lest you should take pleasure in this treacherous kiss given by the world; look upon it as the kiss of Judas; although no harm may be meant by it, the devü is always on the alert and may despoil your soul unless you defend yourself.

  2. Believe me, in such a case you must stand ready with the sword of recollection in hand. Although you may think that no harm is done you, do not trust to that — remember how many who stood on the heights have fallen into the abyss. There is no safety during this life, but for the love of God, sisters, always struggle within your own heart against these dangerous flatteries; then you will come forth with deeper humility, and the devil, who has been watching both you and the world, will be crestfallen.

  3. I could say much about the peace our bodies can bring us, and the harm that results. I will give you some warnings upon certain points which will guide you about the rest. The body, as you know, is very fond of comfort,

8 lYay of Perf., ch. xv. 4, 5. Rel. i. iS, ig. * Ibid., ch. X. 4, 5; xi. 4. and we ought to realise the great danger of pacifying it. I often wonder, and never can understand, how selfindulgent persons can feel so peaceful and at rest. Did the most sacred body of our great Model and Light merit less enjoyment than do ours? Had He done aught to deserve the cruel sufferings it bore?

  1. The Saints are in heaven, this is certain; have we read of any who got there by living luxuriously on earth? Then, how can we feel so easy about doing so? Who told us that it was right? How is it that some men squander their time uselessly in eating and sleeping well and in amusement and ease? I am amazed at it. One would suppose there was no future world, and that this was the safest way to live!

  2. Daughters, if you only knew what harm there is in this! While the body grows sturdy the soul becomes so enfeebled that, if we saw it, we should fancy it was about to become extinct. Many books warn us of the injury done us by finding our peace in bodily comfort. If men only realised it was wrong, there would be some hope of their amending, but I fear the idea never occurs to them, nor am I surprised, since the habit is so universal. I assure you that though they may enjoy physical ease, they will have a thousand struggles to go through in order to save their souls. It would be better for them to understand this and to do the penance by degrees which will one day come upon them all at once.

20 . I have told you this, daughters, to make you thank God for placing you where your body could not find such peace, even if you sought it. Yet it could harm you unconsciously under the pretext of illness, and there is need to warn you urgently against this. For instance, it might injure you to take the discipline on a certain day, but perhaps there is no necessity to leave it ofí a whole week. Again, it would harm you not to wear linen, but you need not do so for several days. On another occasion you cannot eat fish, yet it would not disagree with you when your digestion became used to it. You may fancy you are too weak for this and a great many other things. I am experienced, and I know that nuns are sometimes unaware of how important such things are when there is no urgent need of such dispensations. What I say is, that we ought not to be content with such relaxations, but should, from time to time, try whether we can fulfil our duties: flesh and blood are very treacherous, and there is need for us to recognise this. May God, of His great bounty, give us light! Prudence and confidence in our superiors' judgment instead of our own are the important points.

  1. To return to my subject. By describing the special peace she asks for in the words, " Let Him kiss me with the kiss of His mouth," the Bride shows that our Lord has other ways of bestowing His peace and friendship. I will describe some of them so that you may see the difference and realise the sublimity of this kind. 0 great God and Lord of ours! How profound is Thy wisdom! Well might she say: " Let Him kiss me! " Yet it seems as if she might have concluded her petition here, for what is the meaning of " the kiss of His mouth "? Undoubtedly there is no superfluous letter in these words. I do not understand her reason, yet I will write something on the subject; as I said, it matters little if it is not the exact meaning so long as it profits us.

  2. Our King confers His peace and friendship on the soul in many ways, as we see daily, both during prayer and at other times, but our peace with Him hangs by a single hair, as the expression is. Consider, daughters, the meaning of these words, so that you may utter them with the Bride, if our Lord should draw you near to Himself; if not, do not lose courage. Every kind of friendship with God WÜ1 leave you rich in gain, unless of your own accord you forfeit it. But how deeply should we grieve and regret it if, through our own fault, we do not attain to such close friendship with Him, but content ourselves with a slighter intimacy.

  3. Alas, Lord! Do we not remember how great are the reward and the goal? A reward which, when our friendship has attained to this grade, is bestowed on us by God even in this world! How many remain at the foot of the mountain who might have climbed to its summit! I have often told you in the other little works I have written, and I now repeat it: always make courageou s resolutions. for then God will give you grace to act accordingly.* Rest assured that much depends on this.

  4. There are people who, though they have attained to friendship with God, for they confess their sins sincerely and repent of them, yet before two days are over, commit the same faults again. This is certainly not the friendship for which the Bride petitions. O daughters! try not to take the same fault to confession every time. It is true that we cannot help committing sins, but at all events let them not always be identical, lest they take root, for it would be hard to pull them up, and they may even send out many oñ-shoots. If we set a plant or a shrub and water it every day, it will grow so sturdy that we shall want a spade and a fork to tear it up. This appears to be the case with any fault, however small, that we commit daily, unless we amend it; though it is easy to uproot it when it has only grown for a day or even for ten days. We must pray to our Lord to grant us this amendment, for on our own account we can do little, except add to our sins instead of giving them up. Remember that this will be of no small consequence to us in the terrible judgment at the hour of death, especially to those whom the Judge made His brides during their lifetime.

  5. O great and marvellous condescension! that God should invite us to endeavour to please our Lord and King! Yet how ill do those requite His friendship who so

1" Life, ch. xiiL 3. Way of Perf., ch. xxiii. i, 3. soon again become His mortal enemies! Great indeed is the mercy of God! Where can we find a friend so patient? When once such a severance has occurred between two companions it remains unforgotten and their friendship is never so close as before. Yet how often does such a breach occur between us and our Lord, and how many years does He await our return! Blessed be Thou, my Master, Who art so long-suffering in Thy pity for us that Thou seemest to forget Thine own greatness, and dost not, as Thou hast the right, chastise such faithless treason! The state of such souls seems full of peril, for though God's mercy is manifest, yet sometimes we see them die // without confession. May He, for His own sake, deliver

us, daughters, from such danger!

  1. A better sort of friendship is that of persons who are careful not to oñend God mortally — indeed, as the world goes, it is a great thing for souls to have got so far. Though such people avoid grave faults, yet I believe they fall into them occasionally, for they care nothing about venial sins, although they commit many every day, and are thus on the point of mortally offending God. They ask: " Do you scruple about that? " (as I have heard many people say); "this fault will be effaced with a little holy water and the remedies of our holy Mother Church." ^^ How very sad this is!

11 Way of Perf., ch. xli. 3.

2 St. Teresa had great confidence in the efficacy of holy water. — Life, ch. xxxi. 4-5, 9-10.

  1. For the love of God, be most watchful: never let the thought of so simple a remedy make you careless about committing a venial sin, however small; what is good ought not to lead us into evil. If you remember this resource after you have fallen — well and good! It is a great thing to preserve so pure a conscience that there is nothing to hinder your asking for the perfect friendship desired by the Bride. Most certainly, the state described is not this amity, but a very dangerous one for many people, tending to self-indulgence and likely to lead to great tepidity, nor are they always certain whether their faults are venial or mortal. God deliver you from such a friendship! for these souls think they have not committed such grievous sins as they see in others. To hold others worse than oneself is a want of humility," while, perhaps, they may be far better, being deeply sorry and contrite for their misdeeds, and more firmly resolved than their critics to amend, so that in future, perhaps, they will offend God neither in light nor in grave matters. The first mentioned, as they think that they do no serious wrong, are much more lax in indulging themselves: they rarely say their prayers devoutly, as they do not trouble themselves about such details.

  2. There is another kind of friendship and peace that our Lord bestows partially upon certain persons who wish not to offend Him in any way, yet who do

13 Cattle, ]VL iii. ch. ii. 19. not completely withdraw themselves from occasions of falling.* They keep their set times for prayer and God grants them the gift of devotion and tears, yet they wish to spend good and regular lives without giving up their pleasures, which they think will conduce to their living in peace even in this world. But the events of life bring many changes and it will be hard for such souls to persevere in virtue; for, not having given up earthly joys and pleasures, they soon grow lax on the road to God, from which there are many powerful foes to turn us. This, daughters, is not the amity asked for by the Bride, nor that you wish for yourselves. Avoid every slight occasion of evil, however insignificant, if you are anxious for your soul to grow in grate and to live in safety.

  1. I do not know why I tell you all these things, except to teach you the danger of not resolutely leaving all worldly things, by which we should free ourselves from many sins and troubles. Our Lord has so many ways of contracting friendship with souls that I should never finish telling about those I know, though I am only a woman. Of how many more, then, must confessors and those who study the subject be aware?

  2. I am astonished at some souls, for there seems nothing to prevent their becoming the friends of God. I will mention one person of this sort whom I knew

1* Way of Perf., ch. xxxvi. 2-7. very intimately a short time ago. She Hked to receive Holy Communion very frequently; never spoke ill of anyone, and felt great devotion during prayer. She lived alone in continual solitude, for she had a house of her own, and she was so sweet-tempered that nothing that w as said ever vexed her, which is a very great virtue, nor did she ever say anything wrong. She had never married, and was now too old to do so. She had suffered much annoyance from others, yet had kept her peace. These appeared to me signs of a soul far advanced in the spiritual life and in a high state of prayer, so that at first I had a very good opinion of her, for I never saw her offend God, and I was told that she carefully avoided doing so. But, on knowing her better, I began to discover that she was peaceful enough as long as nothing touched her self-interest, but when that was in question, her conscience lost its sensitiveness and became extremely lax. She bore patiently what was said to her, but was jealous of her honour and would not wilUngly yield one jot nor tittle of her dignity or the esteem of the world, so wrapt up was she in this miserable sentiment. Her anxiety to know all the current gossip was so great that I wondered how she could remain alone for an hour; besides which she was very fond of comfort. She gilded over all her actions so that they seemed blameless, and, according to her own account of some affairs, I thought it would have been wrong of me to judge otherwise, yet in certain matters it was notorious that she. was in the wrong; — however, perhaps, she did not understand it. At first I hked her very much, and most people took her for a saint, yet afterwards I thought she ought to have owned that she herself was partly in fault as regards some of the persecutions she told me she had suffered. I did not envy her sanctity nor her mode of life; indeed, she and two other persons I have known who considered themselves saints, when I became intimate with them struck me with greater fear than all the sinners I ever met.

  1. Let us beg God to enlighten us; and thank Him fervently for having brought you to this convent, where, however hard the devil tries, he cannot deceive us as if we lived in our own homes. Some souls seem quite ready to soar to heaven, since they are perfect in every way in their own opinion and there is no one to know better; yet in a religious community they are always detected, for there they must obey instead of following their own way. But in the world, although they sincerely wish to know themselves in order to please God, yet they cannot do so, because they follow their own will in everything they do, and although it may be crossed at times, yet they are not so exercised in mortification. Certain persons are to be excepted who for many years have received divine light to seek some one who understands them, to whom they submit although they may be more learned than he, for their great humihty destroys all self-confidence.

  2. There are other people who have left everything for our Lord; they possess neither home nor belongings, and care nothing for pleasure or worldly matters, but are penitent, because our Lord has shown them the worthlessness of all these things. Still, they are very tenacious of their honour and value their reputation; they will do nothing that does not please men as well as God. How discreet and prudent they are! These two objects are hard to reconcile, and the mischief is that, half-unconscious of their error, they always take the world's side in preference to our Lord's. They are generally very grieved if anything is said against them. They do not carry the cross but drag it after them, and so it pains and wearies them, but when it is loved it is undoubtedly sweet to bear. Neither is this the friendship the Bride asked for; therefore, daughters, since you have made the sacrifice I spoke of in the beginning of this book, do not fail or hesitate to yield the rest. All such things would burden you if you have forsaken the chief thing in giving up the world with its joys, its pleasures and riches, which, false as they are, still delight us — what have you to fear?

  3. You do not understand the question. To free yourself from the vexation of being found fault with,

1^ Supra, § 7. you burden yourselves with a thousand cares and obligations. These are so numerous, if we seek to please society, that it would take too long to describe, nor do I even know them all.

  1. To conclude with, there are other souls in whom, if you examine them attentively, you will find many signs that they are beginning to make progress, yet they stop midway. They care little for what is said of them, or for honour, but are unused to mortify themselves or to renounce self-will, and have not yet lost all fear of temporal evils. Prepared to suffer all things, they have apparently reached perfection, yet in grave matters, when our Lord's honour is at stake, they prefer their own interests. They do not realise it, but imagine that they fear God and no one else. It seems as if the devil must suggest to them the drawbacks they prophesy a thousand years beforehand concerriing the great harm that may result from some good work.

  2. These are not the souls to imitate Saint Peter when he cast himself into the sea,* or to follow many other of the saints. They wish to draw others to God, but to do so peacefully without running into danger themselves, nor does their faith inñuence their motives very powerfully. I have noticed that we rarely see anyone in the world (I am not speaking now of religious) who trusts to God for maintenance; indeed, I only know

^® St. John xxi. 7. two such persons. People know that they will want for nothing in religion, although I believe that no one who enters it purely for the sake of God even thinks of this. Yet how many are there, daughters, who but for this assurance would not forsake all they possess! However, as in my other writings I have spoken fully about such cowardly souls ^^ and the harm they do themselves, and also of the great advantage of having high aims although our actions may not correspond with them, I will say no more about them, though I should never grow tired of the subject.

  1. Since God has raised souls to this high state, let them serve Him in it and not remain shut up in themselves. If religious (and nuns especially) cannot help their neighbour personally, they have much power to do so by prayer, if their resolutions are heroic and their wish of saving souls is sincere. Our Lord may even permit them to be of some service to others, either during this life or after death, as He did the holy friar Saint Diego, ^* who was a lay-brother and only did manual work. Yet,

" Way of Perf. See chapters ii., iv., xxxiv., and xxxviii.

^* St. Diego (or Didacus), born in Andalusia, became a Franciscan lay-brother at Arizafa, where he led a most holy life. Though uneducated, he obtained so much light in prayer that theologians from all parts consulted him on difficult questions. Having been sent to the Canary Islands, he converted many infidels. Still a lay-brother, he was made Guardian. He was eventually recalled to Spain and died at Alcalá de Henares, November 12, 1463. Among other miracles he cured Don Carlos of a mortal wound. many years after his decease, God has revived his memory to be our example. Let us give thanks to His Majesty. Therefore, my daughters, if our Lord has called you to the religious state, there is little wanting to obtain for you the friendship and peace desired by the Bride. Ask for it unceasingly with tears and longing; do all you can on your part to gain it from God. You must understand that the state of religion is not in itself the peace and amity begged for by the Spouse, although such a vocation is a signal and divine favour; but this friendship is the result of much practice in prayer, penance, humility and many other virtues. May God, the Giver of all things, be praised eternally! Amen.

Footnotes

  1. Life, ch. XXX. 17. Castle, M. iv. ch. i. 3. ↩

  2. St. Luke xvi. 19-31. ↩

  3. The poverty practised by the holy Mother, says Yepes, was extreme, if such a word can be appHed to so great a virtue. She often left her convent without any provision for the journey, yet neither the things she needed nor her trust in God ever failed her. She took most pleasure in those convents that were founded 9 in the deepest penury, and used to say that the only things required for a foundation were a small bell and a house on hire. Once, when founding a convent she rejected the offer of a counterpane and a brasier, as she thought both these articles unsuitable for Discalced nuns. She also refused other gifts of greater value, for she shunned riches as other people seek them. An instance was told by the Duchess of Alva, Doña Maria Enriquez, who, knowing her need and poverty, gave her some valuable jewels which the holy Mother received with gratitude, as she did not like to appear to despise the presents, yet on taking leave of her hostess she handed them to the waiting maid with an injunction to return them to the Duchess {Life, bk. ii. ch. 36). ' Way of Perf., ch. ii. 6, 7. ↩

Chapter 3 of 8