Letter 121. To Fray Ambrosio Mariano, Madrid, Toledo, October 21, 1576

On the rcjeóíion of novices. Project of foundations at Madrid, Malagon and Salamanca. Reception at Veas of several rich postulants,

JESUS!

May the grace of the Holy Spirit be with your

Reverence.

EVIDENTLY your Reverence is unaware of my obligations and affeélion as regards Father Olea, since you write to mediate for him concerning matters already arranged or being arranged between us. I think you know that I am not ungrateful, and I assure you that if there were only a question of my losing peace and health I should have already given my consent. But when it is a case of conscience, friendship must give way, for I owe more to God than to any human being. I wish that it were only a question of the candidate's dowry, for your Reverence already knows, or if not you can make sure by enquiry, that there are many nuns in our convents who entered without a penny. On the contrary, this girl has a large portion, for they are giving her five hundred ducats which would enable her to enter any religious house.

As Father Olea is not acquainted with the nuns of this convent, I am not surprised at his incredulity, but, knowing how they serve God and how pure their souls arc, I could never believe they had deprived any one of the habit without grave reason. They are so scrupulous on the point that since they came to this determination, there must have been ample cause for it.

Our number being limited, such trouble is caused by any one unsuited to our Order that even a lax conscience would feel scrupulous about admit-ting such a person: how much more would souls that avoid displeasing our Lord in any way. Will your Reverence tell me, if the nuns refuse her their votes, how I or any superior can force them to take the postulant?

Do not imagine that Father Olea is concerned about the novice; he wrote to me saying that he cared no more for her than for any one he might pass in the street. It must be my sins which have caused you to feel such zeal about a projed: which cannot be realized and in which, to my great regret, I cannot serve you. In fad:, if the matter could be managed I should be rendering no service to the novice by keeping her among nuns who do not want her. I have interfered in this community even more than I had the right to do by making the sisters retain her another year against their will to try her longer and to enable me to examine into the affair if I call there on my way to Salamanca. I have done this to please Father Olea and to satisfy him thoroughly, although I am certain that the nuns are telling no falsehood, for you know that they are incapable of the slightest untruth. It is nothing new for novices to leave our convents; it happens frequently. The novice would lose nothing by saying that she had not the health for our austerities, nor have I ever known any one disparaged on that account.

This will be a warning to me, and in future I shall inform myself more accurately about such matters. Therefore, although you are extremely pleased with her, we shall not accept Señor Nicolas' candidate, nor do I wish to make enemies for myself by pleasing my patrons and friends. It is strange that your Reverence should ask why I concern myself about such affairs; unless I did, we should take no nuns. I wished to oblige Señor Nicolas, but the first account of her I received from him differed greatly from the second, and as he cares more for the welfare of our convents than for that of any special person, he agreed with me about her. For the love of God, say no more about her, for she has sufficient dowry to obtain her entry into some convent where the community is not so small that its members must be most carefully seledled. If hitherto we have not been so circumspeft in our choice of certain candidates (though this applies to the case of very few) the results have been so unfortunate that we shall be cautious in future; so do not make trouble between us and Señor Nicolas, as there would be if we refused her again. I was amused at your Reverence's declaring that you could see her charaóler at a glance. We women are not so easy to understand. A priest will hear our confessions for many a year and be astonished at the end to find how little he really knows of us. It is because we are too ignorant of our own nature to tell our faults, and our confessors judge us by what we say. My Father, when you wish us to oblige you in our convents, send us persons of good capabilities and you will find wc shall not rejed: them for want of a dowry: otherwise we can do nothing for you.

I thought it would be easy for our friars to obtain a house at Madrid and that, though it was not a priory, there would be little difficulty in obtaining leave for Mass to be said there, as though it were a private gentleman's house. I told our Father, but he said it was not feasible as it would compromise our aflairs, and I believe he was right. Your Reverence, knowing his wishes, ought not to have gathered so many friars together nor to have prepared the church as though you had permission. It made me laugh, for I have never even bought a house without leave from the Ordinary. You know what I suflfered at Seville through omitting this. I have often told your Reverence that you will never succeed without authorization from the nuncio, and I was stupified when Don Jerónimo' told me that you had recourse to the (Calced) Fathers for help. As I do not wish to resemble your Reverence in the trust you put in them (at least for the present,) I do not intend to talk to Valdemoro, for I susped: that any friendship he may show us is not for our benefit but for the purpose of discovering something to tell his brethren. I wish your Reverence to imitate me; I do not desire the projed: to be carried out by means of any such friends. Leave it to Him Whom it concerns; that is, to God. His Majesty will bring it to pass in His own time. Do not hurry the matter so much, for precipitation means ruin.

You must know that Don Diego Mejia, being a perfeft gentleman, will keep his promises, and since he has decided to speak in this way, must be depending on his cousin's help. But believe me, if his cousin will not aid him, he will not aid his aunt. It would be useless to write to her or to any one else, for the family are very loyal to one another and the relationship and friendship of Don Diego Mejia are things to be prized.

It is also a good thing that the archdeacon should have undertaken to make a statement in our favour, for he would not have charged himself with it had he not thought it right. The matter is going on well; be in no hurry or it will suffer later on. Let us watch what Don Diego and the archdeacon do. I will find out whether there is any one who will speak of the affair to them ; if the dean has any influence, Doña Luisa will persuade him to intervene.

I have been greatly pleased with the whole matter which strengthens my belief that this foundation will render God good service, since neither one side nor the other has taken our part. It is very satisfacflory that you have obtained a house, for sooner or later we shall receive the licence. If the nuncio had granted it, all would now be settled. God give him good health as He sees we have need of him. I assure you that Tostado has not lost heart nor are we secure against his carrying on the work of the person who caused him to commence it.

As for the projed: of Salamanca, Fray Juan de Jesus is so ill with the quartan fever that I do not see of what use he could be; on the other hand your Reverence does not explain what is wanted of our Discalced fathers. As respedls our college in that town/ let us begin with the principal matter, which is to obtain the licence for it from the nuncio. When he has given it, the matter is accomplished. If a mistake is made at first, every thing goes wrong afterwards. It appears to me that the bishop, having learnt that Don Juan Diaz is being kept at Madrid, wants some one to take his place. But I do not know whether it would be compatible with our Rule to take the chaplaincy: I think not. Even if it were, what would the efFedl be of your leaving the place after two months except to displease the bishop? Nor do I know whether our fathers would be suitable as managers of such a house. Perhaps they would look for a perfeólion in these women which is not to beexpefted of them, and it is uncertain whether the bishop would care to have friars there. I assure your Reverence that the matter is not so easily settled and that we might lose where we expefted to gain.

It does not appear to me to conduce to the reputation of our Order that our friars should become chaplains, for that is what is really required of them. The world ought to view them as hermits given to contemplation and not as busied about the care of women of that class, with whom, except to withdraw them from vice, I do not think it would be well for them to be seen. I mention these objedtions so that your Reverence may examine the matter and decide as seems right to you. I submit my opinion to yours as you will know best. Read what I have written to the Señor Licentiate Padilla and Juan Diaz for I have no more to say about the matter.

The bishop's licence will always be assured to us, otherwise I have no great confidence in the negotiations of Señor Teutonio who, well-intentioned as he certainly is, has but little influence. I have been waiting for an opportunity of going to Salamanca to hasten the matter, for I am a great busy-body, (ask my friend Valdemoro if it is not true), and I do not wish the projeft to fail because we could not carry it out successfully. I have always set my heart on having foundations at Salamanca and Madrid.

I was glad that all idea of founding at Ciudad Real has been renounced until circumstances are more favourable, for I do not think it would have been a success in any way. Unsuitable as Malagon is, it would be preferable. Doña Luisa greatly wishes for it and it would help you much as time goes on. There are several large villages near, you would have enough to live on and if you went there, you would have a plausible excuse for relinquishing

• Don Teutonio de Braganza.

Madrid. People would suppose you had not altogether abandoned the plan but were waiting for a house, as it seems considered of little consequence that a priory should be founded one day and deserted on the next.

I gave Don Jerónimo a letter for Don Diego Mejia which he ought to forward with another addressed to Count Olivares. I will write again when necessary but let your Reverence be careful to remind him about the affair. I repeat that if he stated plainly that he would undertake the business, that he had spoken to the archdeacon, and that he looked upon it as settled, it is safe. He has written to me about a postulant. Had God willed that those we refused resembled her, we should most certainly have accepted them. Our Fathers mother has been making enquiries about her. While telling you this, it occurred to me that when I reply to Don Diego about the girl, I might mention our projed: and recommend it to him again, and so I will. Will your Reverence deliver the enclosed note to him. Abide with God.

This letter is so long that one would suppose I had nothing else to see about. I am not writing to the Father Prior because I have a great deal more correspondence on hand, so he must consider this as addressed to him. Remember me very kindly to my Father Padilla; I thank God sincerely for having given him good health. May His Majesty ever be with your Reverence! I will procure the schedule even if I have to apply to Valdemoro for it, and I could not say more than that for I do not think there is a single thing he would do for us.

To-day is the feast of the Virgins

The unworthy servant of your Reverence, Teresa de Jesus.

I received some other letters from your Reverence to-day before Diego arrived. I enclose one to our Father asking for certain permissions, but as it contains nothing about these affairs, be sure to write to him on the matter.

To show you whether my daughters are not more capable than your Reverences, I enclose the end of a letter from the Prioress of Veas See whether she has not found a good house for the fathers of Peñuela ! I am exceedingly glad of it. I venture to say that your Reverences would not have obtained one so quickly.

They have received a nun at Veas with a dowry of seven thousand ducats; two more with the same fortunes are about to enter. Besides this, a lady of very high rank, niece of Count Tendilla, has joined the community and has brought still more in the form of plate: chandeliers, altar cruets, a reliquary, a crystal cross and many other things too numerous to mention. An action has been brought against

' The feast of St. Ursula and the eleven thousand virgins.

the nuns as you will see by the enclosed letters. Will your Reverence kindly consider what they had better do. The best plan would be to consult Don Antonio, and to tell him what height the grilles should be, also what it is that we require and what people's objedions are. In short, will you decide as to what course the nuns had better take.

RELATIONS OF FAVOURS ACCORDED TO S. TERESA AT TOLEDO DURL\G THE YEAR 1576.

L Once, when I was grieving over being obliged to eat meat, and do no penance, I heard it said that sometimes there was more of self-love than desire of penance in such sorrow.

IL One day, while feeling very sad because I had offended God, He said: A11 thy sins are in my sight as if they had never been. Take courage, for thy trials are not over.

I had begun to confess to a priest of the city in which omnes recti corde. Letter iv of St. John of the Cross was written to her. St. Teresa calls her Leonor del Salvador. {(Euvres, iv).

THE LETTERS OF ST. TERESA certain convent and feeling painetl at the prospect, when I heard it said: What dost thou fear? What canst thou lose except the life thou hast already offered me repeatedly ? I will help thee.' This occurred while 1 was at prayer and thoroughly reassured my soul.