Letter, Sala Balust no. 138. To a friend, on tepidity

Your letter gave me mingled feelings of joy and sorrow; for while I rejoice to hear that you are enjoying better health, I regret to hear that you have grown tepid in your religious duties. Let us thank our merciful Saviour for restoring your body, and confess with sorrow the faults we have committed.

Oh tepidity! If those who give way to it only rightly understood what it is, they would less easily fall victims to it, for they would dread to become the slaves of so cruel a tyrant. If we are free from this vice, nothing we can do or suffer for God, even death itself, seems too great a burden, whereas the victim of tepidity finds a straw too heavy for him to carry. This vice ruins a man’s spiritual life, and it not only stops all perseverance in the good he had commenced, but even causes him to repent of having begun it, thus turning into bitterness what should be sweeter than honey to his soul.

The Israelites who journeyed through the desert had appetites so disordered that they could not enjoy the manna “ containing in itself all sweetness,” which God sent them. Their blindness was so great that they did not find 9 * fault with themselves, or with the evil condition of their health, but with the food, which was of the most savoury kind. They asked for some other sort of viand with which they thought they would be better satisfied and pleased: — it was given them, but at the cost of their lives. We are to learn by this that even if the things of God are not always agreeable to us, still we must not wish for what is contrary to them, however delightful it may seem to us, for without doubt it would poison our souls. We should rather rid ourselves of the disgust we feel for religion, and then, when the appetites of our soul are healthy, we shall feel a right and pleasant relish for the food God gives His children.

To work slothfully and tepidly in God’s service will cause you to lead so unhappy a life that you will be forced to change your ways. Besides, such a life is disloyal to our Saviour Who laboured with such ardent love to redeem us, and so willingly took up the cross that His love for us exceeded His suffering. The tepid soul cannot enjoy the world’s pleasures, having given them up in the desire of doing right, and yet, for want of fervour, it does not find happiness in God. In this way such a soul is placed between two opposites, each of which is a torment to it; it suffers such severe afflictions that at last it leaves the right road, and with miserable fatuity seeks the flesh-pots of the Egypt it had left, because it cannot endure the hardships of the desert. Compare the trouble that is undergone by one who serves God diligently and fervently, with that which the tepid soul suffers through sloth, and you will find that the burden borne by tepidity is a thousand times the heavier. It is indeed wonderful that vigils, prayer, fasting, mortification and other works undertaken for our Lord should bring more pleasure to fervent souls than the tepid find in all their feasts, and riches, and other indulgences. The lukewarm Christian appears gay, but grief gnaws at his heart: while the just man, though his life be one of penance, has happiness within his soul.

Why, then, for the sake of shirking a few hardships, do we undergo others far more severe? We prefer dying of hunger to working for our bread. Why cannot we understand that God will reward our labours, and that this reward cannot be earned by boasting of our piety, nor by sleeping, or sitting still with folded arms? We should be ashamed to talk of our love for God, and at the same time be mean enough to refuse to give ourselves any trouble in His service. Is that to honour God, and to esteem Him? It is not fitting that the soul which values it so cheaply should receive so great a boon. This is but justice, as our Saviour teaches, when He bids us watch and be ready to open when He knocks, like servants waiting for their master. He has said that unless a man takes up his cross and follows Him, he is hot worthy of Him. It is not the slothful who take up the cross, but those who love our Lord, Who died upon it. It is not they who imitate His courage and will so share in His victory; for the lukewarm begin the work to-day, and slacken in their efforts to-morrow, until by degrees they desist from it entirely. God threatens us with this when He says: “ Because thou art lukewarm, I will vomit thee out of my mouth,” which means that He will permit the offender to fall into still graver and fouler sins. We must not travel on this dangerous road with our eyes shut, for it is full of thieves who would rob and murder us, and there are many pitfalls into which we might slip, and great impediments to be overcome. We have sometimes seen the prudent and cautious in danger; what, then, can we expect, if we are careless, except that at every chance we should fall as miserable captives into the hands of our enemies?

Let us, then, be diligent, whether it be from motives of fear or of love, and not permit tepidity to master us, for, like gall, it not only embitters religion to us, but it makes our service distasteful to God. Let us set to work in earnest, for, as the Holy Scripture says: “If thou be diligent, thy harvest shall come as a fountain.” (Prov. VI. n.) Then we shall experience the truth of Christ’s promise that He would give to those who serve Him a water, of which he who drinks, shall never more be thirsty. If He gives this water to us during this life, what will He not give to us in the world to come? If such solace is given us during the battle, what shall be the feast of victory? Let us do violence to ourselves, for that is the way to come to the kingdom; and in proportion as we deny ourselves, and renounce our inclinations, do we advance on our way to heaven and become more pleasing to God. I do not think you should employ yourself in study until you have spent at least a year, and more if necessary, in eradicating from your heart all its evil habits and propensities. You should set about this at once, for until it is done, I consider that you ought to attend to nothing else.