13 — THE SEARCH FOR GOD AND DAILY DUTIES

Presence of God. — My soul, withdraw into your interior and there persevere in forgetfulness of all things, seeking God with the affection of your heart.

Meditation

1 — “Whatever you do, in word or in deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him” (Col. 3, 17). Not only during hours of prayer, but always, in every action and care of life, one must seek God; it is precisely in this sense that Jesus said: “it is necessary always to pray” (Lk. 18, 1). There are occupations and contacts with creatures required by the duties of one’s state: they are expressions of the will of God and therefore one cannot think that, in order to seek God, it is necessary to withdraw from them; if in them one regulates oneself according to the exact measure required by the divine will, these can never, of themselves, constitute an obstacle to the soul’s union with God. One must, however, remain solely within the sphere of the will of God; in other words, in contacts with creatures and in various activities one must have one single aim: the fulfillment of one’s duty. But when the “affection” of the will rests in such things seeking in them some personal satisfaction—to satisfy curiosity or the natural need for affection, to assert oneself, to draw others’ esteem, etc.—then one goes out of the track of the will of God, the heart attaches itself to creatures, thus finding a real obstacle, and the greatest one, to the continual search for God. St. John of the Cross requires precisely that one go out “from all things according to the affection and will” (C. 1, 6). Far more than a detachment, than a material withdrawal from the world, what is required is detachment of heart.

2 — “Whether you eat or drink, whether you speak or deal with secular people, or do anything else whatever, keep always desiring God and uniting to Him the affection of your heart. This is very necessary for interior solitude, which requires that the soul have no thought not directed to God” (J.C. AR. 9). For it to be possible to seek God and live in union with Him even amid business and contacts with the world, “interior solitude” is necessary, that is, the “interior cell” of which St. Catherine of Siena speaks: the cornerstone, without which even solitude and the material cell would be useless, is always detachment. A heart not totally detached will always and everywhere find something capable of diverting it from the search for God, of binding it, of rendering it more or less prisoner of creatures, of filling it with earthly affections and desires. But once detachment is realized, the soul acquires the great, supreme freedom to seek God and tend toward Him alone through all things; it becomes capable, in every occupation and activity, of going on desiring God and uniting to Him the affection of the heart.

On this earth, the search for and union with God is made much more through the will than through the intellect. Even when duty—study, work, teaching, apostolate—requires intense application of mind and dedication of works, the soul can remain oriented toward God with the affection of the heart, that is, with the “desire of charity” that unceasingly impels it to seek God, His will, His glory. If the charity of Christ urges us on, nothing will be able to separate us from Christ.

Colloquy

As the thirsty deer longs for springs of living water, so my soul longs for You, O God. My soul is thirsty for You; You alone it desires, seeks, and wills.

“O compassionate and tender Lord of my soul, You have said: ‘Come to me, you who are thirsty, and I will give you to drink.’ O life that gives life to every being, do not wish to deny me this sweetest water that You promise to those who desire it. Lord, I desire it, I ask it of You, I come to You. Do not hide Yourself from me, Lord. You know my need and You know that this water is the only remedy to be given to the soul wounded by You... O living springs gushing from the wounds of my God, with what abundance you flow forth to be our relief! And with what security he will walk amid the dangers of this life who knows how to drink of this divine liquor!” (T.G. Es. 9, 1 and 2).

You alone, Lord, can quench my soul thirsty for supreme Truth, infinite Charity, eternal Beauty! When my heart lingers on any created thing seeking in it some satisfaction, when it lets itself be seized, even for a little while, by some earthly affection, or immerses itself without discretion in the affairs and cares of life, very soon it must withdraw fatigued and tired, empty and burdened. O Lord, create in me a pure and upright heart that always and in everything seeks You; order charity in me, so that my affections and desires may remain constantly oriented to You.

“Who can free himself from low ways of acting, unless You raise him to Yourself in purity of love, my God? How shall man, born in abasement and mud, rise to You, unless You, Lord, lift him up with the hand with which You formed him? You will not take from me, my God, what once You gave me in Your only-begotten Son Jesus Christ, in whom You gave me all that I desire; and for this I shall rejoice, sure that You will not delay, if I hope. But why do you put off delays, my soul, when from this very moment you can love God in your heart?

“Mine are the heavens and mine is the earth; mine are peoples, the just are mine and mine are sinners; the angels are mine, and the Mother of God and all things are mine; and God Himself is mine and for me, because Christ is mine and all for me. Therefore, what do you seek and ask, my soul? All this is yours, and all for you.

“Do not turn to what is lesser, do not wish to content yourself with the crumbs that fall from the table of the heavenly Father; go out and glory in your glory: there hide yourself and rejoice, and you will obtain the fulfillment of the desires of your heart” (J.C. Prayer of a soul in love).