21 — SEEKING GOD IN ACTIVITY

Presence of God. — I leave every external activity, to recollect myself at Jesus’ feet and ask Him to teach me to maintain this interior position even in the midst of my occupations.

Meditation

1 — To the soul that wishes to reach holy recollection quickly, St. John of the Cross teaches: “Never undertake any work, however good and full of charity it may seem to you,... without the order of obedience” (C. 1, 11).

In this way the soul is sure of moving solely in the will of God; and the will of God cannot allow that occupations required by it—although absorbing and pressing—hinder or even lessen the soul’s recollection in Him. “If one acts only by obedience and with obedience, in which God commands, it does not seem to me that He can destroy His union,” that is, the intimate union between Himself and the soul, affirms St. Teresa Margaret (Sp. p. 237). When external activity is in everything regulated by obedience, not only is the danger of acting out of self-love or of rashly exposing oneself to distractions diminished, but in every occupation one has the certainty of embracing God’s holy will. And if one embraces God’s will, there can be no danger of separating oneself from God, of turning the spirit away from continual orientation toward Him.

The soul’s union with God is made not so much in the sweetness of prayer as in embracing God’s holy will perfectly.

2 — “It is necessary that in external works, even if they are of obedience and charity, we always seek not to be distracted and often withdraw inwardly with our God” (T.G. Fd. 5, 17). Here is the second condition so that external activity may not disturb interior recollection.

“I will do nothing with haste or disturbance” was the constant resolution of St. Teresa Margaret who, amid a remarkable activity, maintained “a bearing always peaceful and tranquil, so that she seemed to have made herself mistress of herself in each act” (Sp. pp. 273 and 277). This means always preserving full mastery of oneself and of one’s activity and, therefore, avoiding the danger of letting oneself be dominated and dragged along by action. Whoever plunges headlong into action, with no caution, will soon see the soul slip from his hands: he will lose calm, become agitated, render himself incapable of recollection, and more and more so, the more pressing and demanding action becomes.

Jesus reproached Martha not because she gave herself to action, but because she became anxious in it: “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things” (Lk. 10, 41-42). The Lord wants action, but He does not want anxious agitation, because even in action the soul must attend to “the one thing necessary,” that is, union with Him. Therefore, as soon as the soul notices that it begins to lose its interior calm, it must, if possible, interrupt action at least for an instant and withdraw inwardly with God. These brief moments of recollection, repeated often, will little by little accustom it to remain calm and recollected in God even in activity.

Colloquy

O Lord, here, at Your feet, in the light of Your divine presence, I want sincerely to examine my occupations to see whether they are truly all regulated by holy obedience.

You make me understand that when I act solely on my personal initiative without a true motive of obedience or charity, then it is very easy for my actions to draw me away from You; they draw me away either because in them I occupy the time that I should instead dedicate to prayer, or because, acting on my own head, I often do nothing but follow my self-love, my natural tendency to activity, my own views, my own will. In these cases I am united not to Your will but to mine, not to You but to my self-love. My God, free me, I beg You, from so great a danger! To toil and suffer in order to do Your will, in order to unite myself to You, this, yes, with Your help I always want to do, O Lord; but to toil and suffer in order to do my own will, to follow my self-love, would truly be foolish; all the more so since my soul will pay dearly for it! Guard me, Lord, from such folly and do not allow me to be so blind as to waste my strength for so vain an end, and at the expense of my interior life.

Give me, O Lord, the “passion” for Your will, so that I may know how to will and do nothing except what You will, what You ask of me through the commands and desires of my Superiors or through the counsel of him who guides my soul. All else must no longer exist for me, because I want only You, only Your will.

But then, my God, help me also not to let myself be dominated and dragged along by action. Help me to remain always calm and recollected even amid the most intense activity, always peaceful in the presence of You, the Peaceful One. Only this constant interior calm and peace will allow me to keep my soul’s faculties united in one bundle and keep them fixed on You, despite the many demands of exterior activity. O my Jesus, was this not what You meant when You spoke to Magdalene of the unum necessarium? “How well this great Saint had understood it! The eye of her soul, enlightened by the light of faith, had recognized You beneath the veil of humanity and in the silence, in the unity of her faculties, she listened to the word You spoke to her. She could sing: ‘My soul is ever in my hands’; and also the brief word: Nescivi! I know nothing anymore! Yes, she knew nothing anymore except You, my God! Noise and agitation could be made around her: Nescivi! She could be accused: Nescivi!” (E.T. II, 2). And even when she necessarily had to detach herself from Your feet and attend to the things of life, her heart remained fixed on You. Even when, after finally finding You risen, she had, at Your command, to leave You in order to run and announce Your resurrection to the Apostles, her soul remained established in an attitude of profound calm, always recollected and concentrated in You.

With Your help may I too, Lord, live in this way!