Letter 214. To Father Gracian, at Alcala Or Pastrana, Avila, February 16, 1578

St. Teresa s arm broken by the devil. Affair of Father Salazar. A postulant for Seville.

JESUS !

MAY the grace of the Holy Spirit be with your Paternity, my Father, and give you strength this Lent for the work which I know that you have before you ! I am wondering whether you will have to travel from place to place. For the love of God, take care you meet with no falls on those bad roads, for I feel more anxious about it since my own arm was broken The arm and hand are still swollen and my arm is in a bandage like a coat of mail, so that I can hardly use it.

There is a hard frost here ; there has been none since the beginning of winter : but, the weather is so fine that one feels the cold here much less than at Toledo — at least I find it so. Perhaps it is because, as your Paternity ordered, a door has been opened into the ante-chamber near the infirmary, making our cell as warm as a stove. In fa6l I have got on extremelv well in this house as regards the cold. Your Paternitv's orders always succeed — God grant I may succeed as well in obeying them!

I should like to know whether the health of Fray Antonio de Jesus still improves and what has become of Fray Mariano' who has so completely forgotten me. Will you remember me kindly to Fray Bartolome.

I enclose a letter written to me by the Provincial of the Society about Carillo's' affair, which disgusted me so much that I should have liked to answer more forcibly than I did, for I knew he had been informed that I had no share in the matter, which is the truth. In fa(fl, as I told your Paternitv, I was very sorry when V heard of the proje(5l and extremely anxious that it should not be carried out. I wrote the most emphatic letter possible to Father Gaspar de Salazar, like the answer I enclose to the Provincial, in which I make my statement on oath, as I thought that otherwise the fathers would not believe me in their present frame of mind. It is most important that they should trust my word about the 'false revelations,' of which he speaks and should not suppose that I used them to influence Father Salazar, which would be a gross falsehood.

But I assure your Paternitv that I fear their threats so little, that I am astonished at the liberty of spirit God has given me. I told the Father Rector that when I was convinced that anything would render God service, the whole Society or the whole world could not stop my carrying it out, but that I had done nothing to forward, nor would I stop his projedl. He asked me at least to write to Father Salazar, repeating as I have said in the enclosed letter that he could not carry out his plan without incurring excommunication. I asked: Is he acquainted with the Briefs?' He replied: Better than I am.' I said: Then I am certain he would not knowingly offend God.' The Father Redior answered: Perhaps his strong affecflion might deceive and mislead him.' So I sent Father Salazar a letter by the messenger who takes this.

How silly it is, my Father, for I knew from certain indications that the fathers had seen my letter to him, though I did not tell the Father Re(5lor so. I warned Father Salazar in it not to trust his brethren, for Joseph, too, had brothers. I know the fathers will read it as it must have been his own friends who revealed his plan. I am not surprised, as they take it overmuch to heart; they must dread his setting an example,

I asked the Father Reftor whether any Jesuits had become Discalced. He answered 'Yes: Discalced Franciscans; but they had first been turned out of the Society and were then given permission to become friars.' I said that this might be done now. But the fathers are not willing, nor am I willing to tell Father Salazar that he ought not to take the step. I will merely state the case, as I have done in this letter, and leave it to God. If it is His work, the fathers will consent; otherwise, (as I say to Father Salazar) I have consulted others on the sub-jed, and he certainly ought not to take the step. Lawyers who hold the contrary opinion must be reiving on the common law, like the other lawyer who persuaded me, at the foundation of Pastrana, that I could receive an Augustinian nun, in which he was mistaken. As for the Pope's giving permission, I do not believe he will, for the doors will be closed.

Will your Paternity make inquiries and let Father Salazar know the result, for I should be deeply pained if he offended God, which I am sure he would not do deliberately.

I feel very anxious, for if he remains where he is, he will lose credit from the fathers' knowing of his wish to join another Order, yet he cannot carry out his projed: unless it can be done lawfully, and I always keep in mind what we owe the Society — though as for their harming us, I do not believe God would allow it. To refuse to receive Father Salazar if we could, out of fear of them, would be to wrong him and would ill requite his kindness. May God dired: the matter; He will guide the father, who I am afraid may have been too much influenced by revelations during prayer, for they say he gives over much credit to them. I have often told him so, but with no avail.

It troubles me to think that the nuns of Veas must have had something to do with the plan, as Catalina de Jesus was extremely anxious he should join us. The great thing is that Father Salazar certainly serves God faithfully, and if he is mistaken, believes that he is obeying the divine will. His Majesty will watch over him. But he has got us into difficulties, and unless I had learnt what I told you from Joseph, I think I should have done all in my power to stop the projed:. But though I do not trust in revelations as this father does, I am most unwilling to oppose him. How do I know that I should not deprive his soul of some great good? for, believe me, it has never seemed to me that he had the spirit of the Society.

While this matter was being discussed, Ardapilla wrote, suggesting that I should tell the ravens to apply to Joannes, asking him to send some one to Avila to examine the case. I should be extremely glad if I had nothing to do with it, but as many objedlions occurred to me, I excused myself as best I could. I know that he suggests it to help us but really there is no help for the present state of things except to go to the root of the matter, unless Paul takes it into his own hands. May God take charge of it as I wish He would ! I heartily regret that I am the stumbling-block for all the rest, and as I

'Joseph' stands for our Lord and 'Ardapilla' and 'Joannes' allude to the Licentiate Padilla.

Juan de la Miseria says in his autobiography that eight Jesuits wished to join the Reform when the college was founded at Alcala but Father Gracian refused them admittance on account of the objections of their superiors.

Vol. in. 5 have sometimes said, much the best remedy might be to throw me into the sea like Jonas, to calm the tempest which perhaps is raised by my sins.

The Prioress of Seville writes asking me to obtain your permission to admit another sister of Blanca, the Portuguese, who has not reached the canonical age: indeed, she must be much younger. It would be well to receive her to pay the rent of the house, for I cannot remember how much they owe. If, when Blanca's parents pay her dowry, they would lend the convent the amount they would give later on to their other daughter (if she enters), or if they would pay the rent in exchange for her board and lodging, it would not be a bad plan. The sisters are never tired of telling how much they are indebted to this Portuguese. Your Paternity must think it over and do what seems best to you.

If I write to you, I never know when to leave off. My brother always asks me to send you his kind remembrances: will you accept them now, once for all, from him and from all the sisters. May our Lord proted: your Paternity and bring you here soon, for you are urgently needed on my account and for other reasons. I do not deny that there may be one of which you are unaware. Dona Guiomar is ill; she comes here rarely, as her complaint has quite incapacitated her.

Will your Paternity send the enclosed letter immediately to Father Salazar, by means of the Prior of Granada who is to deliver it with the

' Dofia Francisca Freyle.

greatest secrecy. Be sure to insist upon that.' I dread any Fathers of the Society writing again either to me or to the sisters here, for they are exceedingly plain-spoken. Or you might send the message via Madrid, asking Roque to take special care of it, paying the porterage well. If he entrusts it to the same muleteer, it is sure to arrive safely. On no account negle(5t this, my Father, for it ought to be sent to Father Salazar to prevent his taking any steps in the matter if he has not already done so. I think it would be well if your Paternity put off giving him the licence ; it would be best for him. May God give you what is best for you, my Father, as I desire.

To-day is the first Sunday in Lent.

The letter from the Father Provincial and its answer may prove useful to us some day. If you think so, do not tear them up.

Your Paternity's unworthy servant and daughter, Teresa de Jesus.

' Father Gracian did not forward St. Teresa's letter to Father Salazar, as appears from her letter of May 22 of this year.