Letter 393. To Father Gracian, Salamanca, Avila, November 30, 1581

Departure of the foundresses for Granada. Generosity of St. “fohn of the Cross. Foundation at Burgos.

Complications concerning Teresita and Beatriz.

Jesus be with your Reverence. HE nuns left to-day, much to my sorrow, and I feel very lonely. They did not share my feelings, especially Sister Maria de Cristo who was most anxious to go, of which she made no secret. The other sister was unsuitable, as you will learn later on; yet as you had written telling me to send her, I was very scrupulous about keeping <her; but Doétor Castro set my conscience at rest.

Fray John of the Cross very much wished tosend your Reverence some money, and made careful calculations as to whether he could spare any from the funds for the journey, but found it impossible. I think’ he will manage to get some for your Reverence.

Antonio Ruiz came to see me a few days ago. His whole mind was bent on travelling with me as he was longing to see your Reverence. He 1s writing to you and handed me two coins (I think they are worth four crowns each) which I am to send to you. I shall certainly not do so until I find a trustworthy messenger. I have had a great struggle not to keep them for myself, for, as things are

TO FATHER GRACIAN Pag going, it is no wonder I was tempted to steal them.’

Mother Inés de Jesus? sent me the enclosed letter with others from herself. I wrote saying that the earliest possible date for our departure would be after the Christmas season, and also announced your arrival at Palencia so that the ladies might have patience. The good prioress must be pressing it because she sees how eager they are, so make no arrangements to preach elsewhere after Advent; you will find exercise for your talents at Avila. Doétor Castro wants you to spend Christmas here, as I do, but little regard is paid to my wishes. I think that there is no alternative to taking Teresica with me, for the theologian highly approved of it, and she is so grieved at my departure after the others’ having left that I think it is necessary. She is very low-spirited, so that if any emergency should arise, I do not know what she might do. I thought it well to give her some hopes of coming with me, although it is a great trouble to me. Glory be to God, Who wills that all the troubles should fall on me.

I am wondering very much whom I shall leave to take my place here. I cannot make up my mind, for, considering how well known was the wish of Ana de San Pedro to go elsewhere,’ I cannot decide to put her at the head of the community. I think

? Because the nuns at Avila were half-starved.

Inés de Jesus, Prioress of Palencia, had made great friends with Catalina de Tolosa when she went to see St. Teresa at Palencia to hasten the foundation at Burgos.

‘St. Teresa feared she might follow her brother’s example by giving up the religious life.

that Sister Mariana® would fill the office well, for she is suitable in many ways, were it not for Father Julian, although he comes rarely now and he interferes with nothing. God will enlighten your Reverence, and we will discuss the matter when you come.

The veiling took place yesterday; the mother and daughter are beside themselves with joy. [am very tired with it all, and did not go to bed until two o'clock.

I have chosen for Granada three sisters from this house, three more from Veas, with Anne of Jesus for prioress; two more nuns from Seville, and two lay sisters from Villanueva who are excellent religious, and whom I take because the prioress asked me, as she had five lay sisters. She was right, and it is well to have them, as the foundation at Granada is so promising. Anne of Jesus will not like it, as she wished to control everything herself. If you approve, will you be firm about the matter, for no better nuns could be found: if not, will you give what directions you think fitting. And now abide with God, for, as I went to bed.at two o’clock and rose early, my head is in a bad state: otherwise, my health is fairly good.

It has just occured to me that it would be inconvenient for Teresa to travel with me if Beatriz? came; it would be impossible to take them both and a burden to me. Yet Teresica would be some help as she recites the Divine Office well. I shall