Letter CXI. In the Person of Elias, a Monk, to his Parents

He exhorts them not to try to hinder him in or draw him back from his wish to serve God. Such attempt would be unworthy and useless.

ELIAS, a monk, but a sinner withal, to his dear parents INGORRAN and IVETTE, with his daily prayers.¹

1. There is only one circumstance in which it would be wrong to obey parents, and that is when God forbids it. For He Himself says: "He that lovcth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me" (S. Matt. x. 37). If you love me in truth like good and affectionate parents: if you have a true and faithful affection towards your son, why are you restless at my hastening to please God, the Father of all? and why do you try to withdraw me from His ser vice, whom to serve is to reign? Truly now I see how a man's enemies arc the men of his oian house (Micah vu. 6). Herein I must not obey you; herein I own you not as parents, but as foes. If you loved me, surely you would rejoice because I go to my Father and your Father, nay, to the Father of all. Besides, what is there common between me and you? What have I from you but sin and misery? It is only this corruptible body which I wear that I confess and own to have from you. Is it not enough for you unhappy ones, to have brought me unhappy into the unhappiness of this world; for you sinners, to have given birth in your sin to me a sinner; to have reared in sin a son born in sin; but you must, by grudging me the compassion which I have gained from Him who willeth not the death of a sinner, make me besides all this, a child of Hell?

2. O, stern father! O, harsh mother! O, parents cruel and void of affection — -nay, not parents at all, but mur derers, whose only grief is the salvation of their offspring, whose only comfort the death of their son, who would rather I should perish with them than reign without them! They are trying to call me back again to the wreck from wrhich I at last escaped, naked; back to the fire from which with much difficulty I have emerged, half-burnt; back to the robbers by whom I was left half-dead, but from whom, through the compassion of the Good Samaritan, I have now a little recovered. Aye, and in the moment of triumph, when the soldier of Christ has almost carried the citadel of heaven — -I boast not in myself but in Him who has con quered the world — they strive to bring him back to the world from the very threshold of glory, as it were a dog to his vomit, a sow to her wallowing in the mire. What monstrous treatment! The house is in flames, the fire presses on from behind. He who would flee is prevented from going out; he who would escape is persuaded to re turn! And that by those who are set in the midst of the conflagration, and who, out of sheer obstinate infatuation and infatuated obstinacy, will not flee from the danger! What madness! If you think nothing of your own death, why do you also wish for mine? If, I say, you neglect your own salvation, what pleasure is it to put hindrance in the way of mine? Why not rather follow me in my flight, that you may escape the flames? But, perhaps, it lightens your torment if you drag me also into your ruin; and your only fear is to perish by yourselves? What solace will the burning of one man be able to afford to others in like case? What comfort, I ask, is it to the damned to have partners in their damnation? What remedy is it to the dying to see others dying? That is not the belief that I learn from the rich man of Scripture, who, being in torments (cf. S. Luke xvi. 28) and despairing of freedom for himself, asked that a message might be sent to his brethren, lest they also should come to the same place of torment. Doubtless he feared that his own suffering would be increased by that of his kindred.

3. What then? Shall I go and console my sorrowing mother by a short visit in time, simply that in eternity I may sorrow both for myself and her without consolation? Shall I go, I say, and make amends to my angry father for my absence in time, and myself find comfort for a time in his presence, that afterwards each for himself and either for other we may be abandoned to an inconsolable grief? Were it not better to follow the example of the Apostle, and, Conferring not with flesh and blood (Gal. i. 16), to listen to the voice of the Lord, who commands, Let the dead bury their dead? (S. Matt. viii. 22). Shall I not sing with David, My soul refused comfort (Ps. Ixxvii. 2), and with Jeremiah, Neither have I desired the woeful day, thou knowest? (Jer. xvii. 16). For why? The lot is fallen unto me in a fair ground; yea, I have a goodly heritage (Ps. xvi. 7). Am I, then, tricked by an earthly promise, or charmed by some fleshly comfort? When men have tasted of spiritual dainties, needs must that those of the flesh seem tasteless. Set your affections on things above, and things below are insipid; yearn after things eternal, and you scorn things transient. Cease, then, my dear parents, cease to trouble yourselves with vain laments and to disturb me to no purpose by calling me back; lest, if you keep on sending messengers about me, you compel me to withdraw still more. But if you abandon [me], I shall never abandon Clairvaux: This shall be rny rest for ever; here -will I dwell, for I have a delight therein (Ps. cxxxii. 15). Here will I pray instantly for your sins and mine; here with constant prayers will I obtain, if I can, what you also desire, that we, who for love of Him are separated from each other for this short life, may in the happy and indissoluble fellowship of another world live in His love for ever and ever. Amen.

Footnotes

1. This heading is now for the first time restored from the Corbey MS., which is much valued. Is this Letter one of those which the Saint sometimes entrusted to the composition of scribes? (see Ep. 38g). Of it Horst speaks as follows: — " Bernard wrote this Letter in the name of Elias, his novice, to his parents, that he might restrain them in their attempt to dissuade their son from his purpose/' " Its contents," says Lessius, " might have seemed rather severe, had they not proceeded from so great wisdom and piety. For who would dare reprove that chosen instrument of the Holy Spirit? He knew how important the question was. Yet it is not his way to write in such sharp tones, unless it is clear that their importunity must throw a man into great danger, or that his friends do not cease pressing him.'' See that most useful treatise on " The choice of a position in life," quest. 4, 36; compare Letter 104. ↩