18 — ASHES

Presence of God. — I place myself in Your presence, O Lord, that Your light may enlighten me on eternal truths and awaken in me sincere desires of conversion.

Meditation

1 — “You are dust and to dust you shall return” (Gen. 3, 19). These words, pronounced for the first time by God and addressed to Adam as a consequence of the sin committed, today the Church repeats to every Christian to remind him of two fundamental truths: his nothingness and the reality of death.

Dust - the ashes that the Priest places today upon your head - which have no consistency and are dispersed by a slight breath of wind, speak very well of man’s nothingness. “O Lord, my life is as nothing in Your presence” (Ps. 38, 6), exclaims the Psalmist. How much your pride, your arrogance, need to understand this truth, to understand that all is “nothing” in you! Drawn from nothing by God’s creating power, by the infinite love that wished to communicate to you His being and His life, you, because of sin, cannot be eternally rejoined to your God without passing through the dark reality of death. Consequence and punishment of sin, death is in itself bitter and painful; but Jesus, who willed in all things to make Himself like us by subjecting Himself to it, gives to every Christian the strength to accept it for love. In any case, death remains; and you must consider it not to be disturbed, but to be urged to good. “In all your works remember your end, and you will never sin” (Sir. 7, 40). The thought of death warns you of the vanity of earthly things, of the swiftness of life - “all passes, God alone remains” - and therefore urges you to attach yourself to nothing, to despise every earthly satisfaction, to seek God alone. The thought of death makes you understand that “all is vanity except loving God and serving Him alone” (Imit. I, 1, 4).

“Remember that you have only one soul, that you must die only once... and you will let go many things” (T.G. A. 68), that is, you will let go all those things that are worth nothing for eternity. For eternity only love is worth, fidelity to God: “In the evening of life you will be examined on love” (J.C. S.C. I, 57).

2 — The whole liturgy of today is an invitation to penance. During the imposition of ashes one sings: “Let us change garments and cover ourselves with ashes and sackcloth; let us fast and weep before God.” It is the invitation to bodily penance, particularly prescribed in this season; but it is immediately followed by the invitation to conversion: “Let us amend ourselves for the sins committed.” The end of physical penance is spiritual penance, that is, humility, recognition of one’s faults, compunction of heart, reform of life.

This is the dominant thought of the day. In the Epistle (Joel 2, 12-19) we read: “Now therefore thus says the Lord: Return to Me with all your heart in fasting, in weeping and in mourning. Rend your hearts and not your garments.” Compunction and conversion of heart are placed first, because if bodily penance does not come from a contrite heart, it has no value. But on the other hand bodily penance prepares the soul for conversion, insofar as it is a means to reach it. “O God - sings the Preface of this season - through bodily fasting, You repress sin, lift up the soul, and grant strength and reward.” Whoever wishes to reach the end - which is renewal of spirit - must willingly embrace the means that leads there, namely bodily penance. These two elements must never be separated: compunction of the heart gives value to penance of the body, and penance of the body helps and expresses compunction of the heart.

The Gospel (Mt. 6, 16-21) then tells us that every penance must be done with sincerity, without vain ostentation, and joyfully: “When you fast, do not imitate the hypocrites who put on a gloomy face and disfigure their countenance so as to show men that they fast.” Vanity and pride render useless and even sinful even the most austere practices of penance: they destroy their substance and value, reducing them to wretched external shells devoid of all content. Therefore, when you mortify your body, be careful to mortify still more your self-love.

Colloquy

“O Jesus, how long is man’s life, although it is said to be short! Short, my God, for using it to gain the life that has no end, but very long for the soul that desires to see itself soon with You.

“My soul, when you shall plunge into the highest Good and know as He knows, when you will love what He loves and enjoy what He enjoys, then you will enter into your rest: your will will lose its inconstancy and will no longer be subject to change... and you will always enjoy Him and His love... Blessed are those who are written in the book of this life! If you are, why then, my soul, are you saddened and disturb me? Hope in God, to whom I shall again confess my sins and proclaim His mercies. I will compose a canticle of praise to raise it, with incessant sighs, to You, my Savior and my God. And it may well be that one day my glory may sing to You, without my conscience experiencing in it the bitterness of compunction, in that dwelling where tears and fears will have ceased forever... O Lord, I prefer to live and die in hope and effort for the acquisition of eternal life, rather than possess all creatures with their passing goods. Do not abandon me, O Lord! I hope in You and my hope shall not be confounded. Grant me always to serve You, and do with me what You will!” (T.G. Es. 15, 1; 17, 5-6).

If the thought of my infidelities dismays me, I will remember, O Lord, that “as soon as we repent of having offended You, You forget every sin and malice of ours. O truly infinite goodness! What more could one want? Who would not blush to ask so much of You? This is the moment to profit from it, accepting what You, merciful Lord my God, offer us. You want our friendship. Who will refuse it to You, when You did not refuse to pour out all Your Blood for us, sacrificing Your life? It is nothing what You ask! To listen to You is of supreme interest to us” (ibid., 14, 3).