Chapter 51: Of the fidelity which we must only expect to fiud in God, and of the grace of patience

As it usually happens that the injuries which we receive from a friend are more difficult to bear than those which ••) receive from an enemy, according to the words of Scrip ture, " If my enemy had reviled me, I would verily have borne with it " (Ps. liv.),— Gertrude, knowing that a certain person, for whose welfare she had laboured with extreme solicitude, did not respond with the same fidelity to her care, and even, through a kind of contempt, acted contrary to what she advised, had recourse to our Lord in her af fliction, who consoled her thus : " Do not be grieved, My daughter, for I have permitted this to happen for your eternal welfare, that I may the oftener enjoy your company and conversation, in which I take so much pleasure. And even as a mother who has a little child whom she loves specially, and therefore desires to have always with her, places something that will alarm her, and oblige her to come back into her arms, when she has strayed from her, so also, desiring to have you always near Me, I permit your friends to contradict you in some things, that you may find no true fidelity in any creature, and therefore have recourse to Me with all the more eagerness, because you know that I possess the plenitude and stability of all contentment."

After this it seemed to her as if our Lord placed her in His bosom like a little child, and there caressed her in many ways ; and, approaching His adorable lips to her ears, He whispered to her : "As a tender mother soothes the troubles of her little one by her kisses and embraces, so do I desire to soothe all your pain and grief by the sweet mur mur of My loving words." After the Saint had enjoyed these and many other consolations for some time, our Lord offered her His Heart, and said to her : " Contemplate now, My beloved, the hidden secrets of My Heart, and consider attentively with what fidelity I have ordered all that you have ever desired of Me for your benefit and the salvation of your soul ; and see if you can accuse Me of unfaithfulness to you, even by a single word." When she had done this, she beheld our Lord crowning her with a wreath of flowers, more radiant than gold, as a reward for the trial of which we have just spoken.

Then the Saint, remembering some persons who, she knew, were tried in other ways, said to God : " Surely these persons merit to receive from Thy liberality, Father of mercies, a richer recompense, and to be adorned with more splendid ornaments than I, since they are not assisted by the consolations which I receive, though so unworthy, and since I do not bear what happens to me with the patience I ought ? " Our Lord replied : " In these things, as in all others, I manifest the special charity and tenderness which I have for you ; even as a mother who loves her only child wishes to adorn her with ornaments of gold and silver, but, knowing that she could not bear their weight, decks her with different flowers, which, without incommoding her, do not fail to add to her attractions. So, also, I moderate the rigour of your sufferings, lest you should fall under the burden, and thereby be deprived of the merit of patience." Then, as the Saint reflected on the great care of the Divine mercy for her salvation, she began to praise Him with great gratitude ; and she perceived that those flowers with which her sufferings had been mystically rewarded expanded more and more as she returned thanks. She understood also, that the grace that God had given her, of praising Him in adversity, was as much more excellent as an ornament of solid gold is to one which has merely been gilt.