Letter 91. To Juan Bautista Rúbeo, General of the Carmelites, Seville, the beginning of February, 1576

The Saint speaks of the foundations at Veas Caravaca, and Seville. She pleads the cause of Fathers Gradan and Mariano. The commission to visit the Carmelite friars given by the Nuncio to Gradan. Complaint about the way in which the decree of reclusión was published. Reasons for her aSiions. Harsh treatment of the confessors and nuns of the Incarnation. Farewell.

JESUS!

May the grace of the Holy Spirit ever be with your Lordship! INCE I have been at Seville I have written

O three or four times to your Lordship, and should have done so more often had not the Fathers who returned from the Chapter told me that you were no longer in Rome but were making a visitation in Mantua. Thank God, that business is over! In these letters I gave an account of the three convents founded within the last year' at Veas, Caravaca, and Seville. Your Lordship owns in them daughters who are very great servants of God. Two convents are endowed but Seville is

Q founded in poverty. We have not even a house of our own, but I trust God we shall have. As I feel certain that some of my letters must have reached you, I will not enter into further details about these foundations.

I have told you how much the account given of themselves by these Discalced fathers differs from what is said about them in Italy. In fad, they are loyal sons of your Lordship, and I dare assert that, in reality, none of those who boast the most about it are more true to you. As they have made me their mediator to beg you to restore them to your favour since they dare not write themselves, I brought forth every argument I knew of in my letters, and entreated you, as I entreat you now, for love of our Lord to grant me this favour and to put some trust in what I say. There is no reason why I should not tell you the whole truth: setting aside the offence I should be committing against God if I did not do so, I should consider it most treacherous and wicked to deceive a father whom I love as I love you, even though it were not against the divine law. When we both stand before His tribunal you will see what you owe to your faithful, loyal daughter, Teresa de Jesus. This is my one consolation in the matter. I know well that there are those who will tell you to the contrary, but as long as I live I shall leave nothing undone to prove to all unbiassed minds my loyalty to you.

I have already explained about the commission given to Father Gracian by the Nuncio, and how the latter sent for him. Your Paternity must know that the commission given to the former to visit the Discalced friars and nuns and the province of Andalusia has been renewed. 1 know for certain that Father Gracian refused it as long as possible: whatever people may say to the contrary, this is the very truth. His brother, the King's secretary, was equally averse to the visitation on account of the great trouble which would result. But when once the aifair was settled, if these fathers' had taken my advice they would have ad;ed as between brothers, letting no one else know anything about it. 1 used all my iniluence to induce them to do so, not only because it was reasonable but also because since we have been here the Calced friars have afforded us every help, and, as 1 wrote to your Paternity, they number men of great talent and learning among them, such as 1 wish we had in our province oí Castile.

1 have always liked to make a virtue ot necessity, as the saying goes, therefore 1 wish that before beginning their resistance they had considered whether they could carry it through. On the other hand, I am not surprised at their being tired of the many visitations and innovations which, for our sins, have been imposed upon us for many years. God grant we may know how to profit by them, as His Majesty strongly incites us to do! However, now that the Visitor is a member of the Order it seems less humiliating and I trust in God that all would pass oil perfeólly well it you showed, by favouring this Father, that he was in your good graces. He will write to your Lordship ; he greatly desires the favour I have asked for him and also to avoid displeasing you in any way because he holds himself as your obedient son.

For love of our Lord and of His glorious Mother, whom you love so dearly, and for whom this Father has so strong a devotion that he entered our Order for her sake, I again entreat you to answer him kindly and to forget the past, though he may have committed faults, and that you will consider him as your obedient son, as indeed he is. So is poor Mariano, although at times he does not weigh his words. I am not surprised that, in his letter to you, he wrote what he did not mean, through being unable to express himself properly, but he declares that he never intended to offend you by word or deed. The devil has so much to gain by these affairs being misunderstood that he must have contrived to lead these Fathers into mismanaging matters against their will.

Let your Paternity remember that it is for children to err and for parents to forgive and overlook their faults. For love of our Lord, I beg you to grant me this favour. Believe me, it would be well for many reasons which you, in Rome, cannot understand as I do in Spain, and though women are not good counsellors, yet sometimes we hit the mark. I do not see what harm could come from such a course and, as I said, much good might result. I can perceive no danger in your forgiving those who would willingly throw themselves at your feet were they near you, since God does not withhold His pardon, nor can I understand why your Paternity should not show that you are glad to see the Reform accomplished by your devoted son whom you rejoice to forgive in return.

Ifonly there were several men to whom the matter could be entrusted ! But there seems no one with such talents as this Father, as I feel sure you would say if you saw him. Then why does your Lordship not show that you are glad to number him among your subjedis, and let all understand that this Reform, if it succeeds, was carried out by your means, counselled and direófed by yourself? If people knew that you approved of it, all difficulties would at once be smoothed away. I should like to say much more about this matter. I beg our Lord to enlighten you as to what is best, for it is long since you have listened to any words of mine. I am very sure, if they are amiss, my intention is not.

Father Antonio de Jesus' has come here: he could not do otherwise, although at first he excused himself like the other Fathers. He is writing to your Lordship, and may perhaps meet with better success than I. May your Lordship draw the right conclusion from all I have said, and may our Lord, as He has power to do, diredl matters as He sees best!

I have been informed of the decree of the General Chapter which forbids my leaving the convent in which I reside. Father Provincial, Fray Angel, sent it to Father Ulloa with an order to notify it to me. He thought it would wound me deeply, as these Fathers intended that it should, and so he kept it back. It must be more than a month ago since, having heard of it from another quarter, I persuaded them to deliver it to me.

I assure your Lordship that, as far as I know my own mind, it would have been a great favour and a joy to me had the order been communicated to me by yourself. I should have understood that taking pity on me for the severe fatigues I have suffered in making these foundations — and I am not fit to suffer much— you had bidden me rest as a reward. For even coming as it has, I feel greatly relieved at being able to remain quiet. But, as I nourish a deep affedtion for your Lordship on account of your kindness to me, I cannot but feel hurt at being treated as a very disobedient person and at Father Angel's having been allowed to publish the order at court before I had been told anything about it. He thought that it would have proved a great constraint to me and wrote telling me that I could appeal to the Apostolic Chamber — as if it were not a profound relief ! Assuredly, even if I could not carry out your orders without the most burdensome efforts, the idea of disobeying you would never cross my mind. God fDrbid that I should ever come to such a pass as to procure my own pleasure against your will, for God knows that I can truly say that it I have found any relief amid the labours, trials, and calumnies through which I have passed, it has been the thought that I was executing your wishes and pleasing you, as I shall feel when I obey your regulation. I wished to do so at once, but as it was near Christmas and the journey was a very long one, I was prevented, as it was believed that you would not wish me to risk my health. That is why I am still here; not that 1 intend to remain permanently in this convent, but only until the winter is over, because I do not agree with the Andalusians. The one favour I beg of your Lordship is not to cease writing to me, for since, greatly to my joy, I shall have no more business aifairs, I am afraid you may forget me. However, I shall not allow you to do that, for, if you are silent, I shall continue writing to you for my own satisfaction.

■It has never been understood here, nor is it now, that the Council and Motu proprio deprive superiors of the power of sending nuns to other houses for the welfare of the Order and for business connected with it, of which many occasions may occur. I am not speaking of myself, for I am good for nothing now, and would willingly remain all my life not only in one convent (which would ensure me a certain amount of comfort and rest) but even in a prison if I understood that it would please you. However, lest your Reverence should feel any scruple about the past, I must tell you that although I hold the patents, I never went anywhere to make a foundation (and it is clear that I could leave my convent for no other purpose) without the written leave or licence of the superior. Fray Angel gave me the permission for Veas and Caravaca, and Father Gracian for this house at Seville, because he then held the same commission from the Nuncio as he does at present, although he made no use ot it. And yet Fray Angel said that I came here as an apostate in a state of excommunication! God forgive him! Your Lordship knows and can bear witness that I have always tried to keep him on good terms with you, and to satisfy him in things which did not offend against God, yet I have never succeeded in persuading him to be friendly to me. It would have been well had he been as severe with Val demoro,' who, as Prior of Avila, drove the Discalced friars from the Incarnation, to the great scandal of the citizens. He so ill-treated some of the nuns (and the state of the community makes one praise God) that their intense distress is pitiable and they write telling that they lay the blame on themselves so as to exculpate him. The Discalced have returned and, from what I hear, the Nuncio has forbidden any one from the Carmelite priory to hear the sisters' confessions. I have felt greatly grieved about these nuns who, on the one hand are only supplied with bread to eat,'° and on the other are so disturbed: I pity them deeply. May God bring all things right and may He preserve your Paternity to us for many years.

I learnt to-day that the General of the Dominicans is coming to Seville. If only God would grant me the favour of a visit from your Reverence! However, I should be sorry at the fatigue it would cost you, so I must wait for my consolation until the eternity which will have no end when your Lordship will discover what you owe to me. May God in His mercy grant I may deserve to attain to it. I recommend myself earnestly to the prayers of the Reverend Fathers" who are with your Paternity, begging you to grant your blessing to the nuns, your subjecfts and daughters, as well as to myself.