7 — APOSTOLIC IDEAL

Presence of God. — Kindle in me, Lord, flame of apostolate and nourish it with your love.

Meditation

1 — As seed cannot put forth stalk that will bear new ear unless it first sinks roots into soil, so soul cannot bear fruits for apostolate unless it first puts down roots of serious interior life, by which it will draw from God Himself sap making it fruitful. Interior life is vital principle, strength, flame of apostolate.

Yet apostolate in turn can contribute to interior life, helping render it more generous and intense. When soul is seized by apostolic ideal, its very desire to win other souls to God urges it to engage with greater generosity in prayer, mortification, and exercise of virtues, precisely with aim of making itself more capable of fruitful apostolate.

Thus, while interior life is soul of apostolate, apostolate in turn is very powerful spring impelling soul to union with God, perfection, holiness. Apostolic ideal in itself awakens spiritual energies and generous holy life. Teresa of Jesus, moved by ardent desire to counterbalance great evil Protestant heresy was causing in her time, gave reform she began a mark of particular austerity and organized life of her daughters so as to engage them in continuous exercise of prayer, sacrifice, and self-giving for salvation of souls.

System of life in Teresian Carmel — contemplative life of deep intensity — was born thus from great ideal of apostolate.

This same ideal has recently caused in Church a new state of life to arise, that of secular institutes, in which souls desiring to consecrate themselves to salvation of brethren commit themselves to live in world according to evangelical perfection. “Specific end [of apostolate] seems necessarily to have required and also created generic end [of perfection]” (Pius XII, Primo feliciter).

When apostolic ideal is alive and rightly understood, instead of recklessly throwing souls into action, it leads them to deeper interior life, total self-gift, holiness, because one must be sanctified to sanctify. “For them do I sanctify Myself” (Jn. 17:19).

2 — An interior life in which apostolic ideal does not shine can never be full and vigorous. This depends on nature of grace and charity, which are by themselves expansive and apostolic.

Although grace adheres intimately and incommunicably to soul endowed with it, it benefits whole Christian community. Dogma of communion of saints tells us precisely that grace and holiness of one member of Christ redound to advantage of all other members.

Likewise charity, inseparable companion of grace, is by nature expansive and, embracing God, embraces all creatures in God. It imprints on soul twofold impulse: toward God and toward neighbor. If one or other of these impulses is repressed, charity is suffocated in its essence.

This virtue develops and reaches maturity only when its two aspects are in full efficiency: love of God and love of neighbor. By excluding or diminishing fraternal charity, of which apostolate is highest expression, one inevitably diminishes love toward God as well.

Therefore an interior life cold and indifferent to good of souls is necessarily diminished and shriveled, reduced to narrow and petty form of piety, often also egoistic. It has lost vital warmth, warmth of charity, and does not even deserve name of life.

Where flame of apostolate is alive, however, one has interior life more vigorous than ever, capable of great generosity. Is it not true that sometimes desire for our own perfection is not enough to give us courage to accept certain sacrifices and renunciations so costly to nature? But when one thinks salvation of other souls may depend on our generosity, fidelity to grace, and immolation, then one can refuse nothing to Lord and finds strength to embrace even harshest and most painful things.

Thus apostolic ideal becomes powerful lever for personal sanctification, and soul, enriched by fervent interior life, can place at disposal of this ideal new energies and new fecundity.

Colloquy

“O Lord, I have immense desires to serve You, and very lively is my sorrow in seeing myself incapable of realizing them. I would like to raise my voice to make everyone understand how important it is not to be content with little in your service, and to make known great treasures received from You when one disposes oneself to receive them.

“My God, I feel very great pain over loss of so many souls, especially those who by Baptism were already members of Church, and I greatly desire to labor for their salvation, so much so that I feel ready to endure a thousand deaths to free one alone from terrible torments of hell. How can one bear seeing a soul condemned forever and to eternal rigor of punishments? If we are moved with compassion for pains of this world, which after all have an end and always cease with death, how can we, O Lord, show ourselves indifferent before torments that will last forever, and before great number of souls devil drags with him to hell each day?

“Since You, my God, see sorrow I feel at sight of great number being lost, save at least one, Lord, at least one who may give light to many others. Not for me, Lord, who do not deserve it, but for merits of your Son. Behold, Lord, his wounds; and since He forgave those who made them, do You also forgive us.

“My God, I want only your will. I am so submitted to it that I no longer desire to live more than to die. Yet, if it pleases You so, I desire to live in order to serve You a little more. If I could contribute in something to make You loved and praised by one soul even for short time, this would seem to me far more important than already being in glory” (T.G. RS. 1, 3; Vt. 32, 6; Es. 11, 3; RS. 6, 7).