That a Sure Way to Be Regarded and Esteemed by Men Is to Give Oneself Up to the Virtue of Humility

| after all that we have said you are not yet brought to the point of abandoning the fumes and breaking off the aspirations and desires of honor and esteem, but say that after all good credit and reputation is a great thing with men and makes much for edification and other purposes, and that the Wise Man advises us to take care of it: Have a care of a good name (Ecclus. xli. 15), I say: “Well, be it so; I am satisfied that you should take care to preserve the good name that you have, and be regarded and greatly esteemed by men; but you must know that you are very much out in the way in which you desire it, even in point of attaining your object, since in that way you will never attain it, but rather the contrary.” The sure and safe way whereby without doubt you will come to be regarded and esteemed by men, says St. Chrysostom, is the way of virtue and humility. Take care to be a good religious, the least and humblest of all, and to show yourself such in your | behavior on all occasions that offer, and in that way you will be much regarded and esteemed by all. This is the honor of the religious who has left the world; better becomes him the broom in his hand and the poor habit and the lowly and humble dress than the arms and the horse become the knight; and on the other hand the desire to be regarded and esteemed by men is a great reproach and disgrace to him. As it would be a great reproach and disgrace to leave religion and go back to the world, and rightly would people mock at such a one because he had put his hand to build and was not able to finish (Luke xiv. 30), so is the desire and pretense to be regarded and esteemed by men; for this is to go back to the world in heart, since that is the choicest thing in the world, and that it was that you gave up and abandoned when you entered religion.

Would you see clearly what a shameful and shocking thing it is, this desire to be esteemed and honored by men, in anyone who professes to aim at perfection? Let this desire come to light, so that others should get to see what you desire, and you will see how hurt and angry you yourself will be at the thing’s getting known. We have a good example of this in the holy Gospel. The evangelists relate how one day the apostles were going with Christ our Redeemer at a little distance from Him, where they thought He would not hear, and they fell to disputing and contending amongst themselves which should be the greater and the chief (Mark ix. 33). When they came to the house in Capharnaum, He asked them: What is it that you were talking about on the way? The holy Gospel says that the poor men were so upset and ashamed at seeing their ambitious pretensions discovered that they could not open their mouths to answer Him. Then the Saviour of the world took up the discourse and said to them: Look, My disciples, there in the world, among men who follow its laws, they are held to be great who are in office and command. But in My school it is the other way about; the greater must become the less and be the servant of all. If anyone wishes to be the first, let him be the last of all, and the servant of all (Mark ix. 34). In the house of God and religion to be humbled and put down is to be great, and to become the least of all is to be regarded and esteemed more than all. This is honor here in religion. That other that you aim at is not honor, but dishonor; and in place of gaining regard and esteem you come thereby to forfeit esteem and to be held in least account of all, because you get the name of a proud man, which is the greatest come-down that you can hit upon. By nothing can you lose so much as by the notion’s getting abroad that you desire and aim at being regarded and esteemed by men and that you stand on points of honor and are sensitive on those trifles.

St. John Climacus says well that vainglory often brings ignominy on its votaries because it makes them fall into things that lay bare their vanity and ambition, and so incur great reproach and confusion. The proud man does not see that in the things that he says and does to gain esteem he discovers the unmeasured craving of his pride and disgraces himself where he thought to gain credit. St. Bonaventure adds that pride so blinds the understanding that often the more pride a man has, the less is he aware of it himself, and so, like a blind man, the proud man says and does things that he would nowise say or do if he bethought himself, apart from any motive of God or virtue, but merely for the sake of that same honor and esteem that he desires. How often does it happen that a man is resentful and complains because they have taken no account of him on such and such an occasion or because they have given the preference to another in such or such an appointment when he fancies that it ought to have fallen to him, and that they have done him an injury thereby and it will redound to his dishonor and discredit and be a stigma upon him, and that others will not fail to see and take notice of it, and under color of this pretense he lets all the world know his mind. Thereby, in point of fact, he is all the more noted and discredited, being taken for a proud man and a man that stands on points of honor, which here in religion is a thing very much disliked; whereas if he dissembled his feelings on this occasion and put himself out of account and let superiors do what they would, he would gain much honor and be greatly esteemed therefore.

Then, though it were not by way of the spirit, but by the law of prudence and good sense and even the law of the world, the right and sure road to being regarded and esteemed, sought after and loved by men, is to give oneself in earnest to the virtue of humility. Even in profane history it is told of Agessilaus, King of the Lacedemonians and a great pundit amongst them, that, being asked by Socrates what he should do to make all men esteem and think well of him, he answered: “Try to be such as you desire to appear.” Another time, in answer to the same question, he replied: ‘Try always to speak well and to do better.” And of another philosopher (Pindar) it is related that he had a great friend, who on every occasion spoke highly in his favor. One day this friend said to him: “You are much in my debt, since wherever I happen to be, I greatly praise and extol your virtues.” The philosopher answered: “I pay you well by living in such a manner that you do not lie in any of the things you say of me.”

We do not mean hereby to say that we should give ourselves to virtue to be regarded and esteemed by men, which would be great pride and perversity. What we mean is that, if you contrive to be humble in earnest and from your heart, you will be greatly regarded and esteemed, although you do not seek it; rather, the more you fly from honor and esteem and desire to be made small account of, the more it will follow you and cling to you like a shadow. St. Jerome, speaking of St. Paula, says: “Flying from honor and esteem, she was honored and esteemed the more, as the more one flies from his shadow, the more it follows him; and, on the other hand, if you try to catch your shadow, it will fly from you, and the more you run to catch it, the more it will fly, so that you cannot come up with it. Such is honor and esteem.”

Christ our Redeemer teaches us this method in the Gospel, where He shows us how to obtain the most honorable places and seats in company. When thou art invited to @ wedding-feast, do not take the place of honor, lest some guest more honorable than thou may have been invited by the master; and then he that hath invited you both, coming in, may say to thee, Give this man place; and then thou shalt begin with shame to take the lowest place; but when thou art invited, go and take the lowest place, that when he that hath invited thee cometh he may say, Friend, go up higher: then thou shalt have glory before them that sit at table (Luke xiv. 8-11). And this is what the Holy Ghost had said before by the mouth of the Wise Man: Do not play the great man in the presence of the King, nor seat thyself in the seats of the mighty: it is better that they should say to thee, Come up hither, than that thou shouldst be humbled before the prince (Prov. xxv. 6-7). And he continues the parable, saying: Everyone that exalteth himself shall be humbled, and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted (Luke xiv. 11). You see how not only before God, but also before men, the humble man, who chooses the low and abject position, is honored and esteemed; and, on the other hand, the proud who desires and puts in for the first place and the best and most honorable posts, is despised and made of less account. St. Augustine (“Ad Fratres de Eremo”) cries out saying: “O holy humility, how unlike thou art to pride! Pride, my brethren, hurled Lucifer from heaven, but humility brought the Son of God to make Himself man. Pride cast Adam out of paradise, but humility lifted up the good thief there. Pride divided and confounded the tongues of the giants; humility gathered together the divided. Pride changed King Nabuchodonosor into a beast, but humility made Joseph lord of Egypt and prince of the people of Israel. Pride drowned Pharaoh, but humility lifted up and exalted Moses.”