VI — OUR PREPARATION

Presence of God. — O Lord, make me generous and faithful in your service, so that I may never place an obstacle to your action in me.

Meditation

1 — The fountain of living water from which loving experience of God and the light derived from it spring is nothing other than the operation of the Holy Spirit, who acts in souls through the activation of the gifts. And since in holy Baptism we have all received the gifts of the Holy Spirit, which are supernatural dispositions making us capable of welcoming divine motions, it is clear that if God has given them to us, it is not to leave them inoperative, but to put them into act. Therefore their activation cannot be considered an extraordinary fact, but one connatural, so that loving experience of God and the contemplative light deriving from it cannot be considered extraneous to the full development of grace. In other words, if a soul opens itself generously to the action of grace, if it follows it with good will, one can well think that the Lord will not refuse at least some drop of living water, that is, some form of contemplative knowledge. St. Teresa affirms this strongly and says in this regard: “You must not then fear... dying of thirst. On this road the water of consolations is never lacking” (Way 20, 2). But one must know well that the “road” of which the Saint speaks is that of total self-gift, of generosity that knows no limits, that never says “this is too much,” generosity that gives itself without calculating and perseveres despite the harshness of the way, interior aridities, and external difficulties.

If it is right that the soul that feels called to divine intimacy esteem and desire contemplation, it is by no means out of place that it seek to prepare itself for it. God does not grant this grace to many souls precisely because he does not find them suitably disposed; it is therefore necessary to work so that we may not remain deprived of it through our own fault. And on the other hand, if we have done all that depends on us to dispose ourselves as best we can, we should not fear that our labor will be lost; in one way or another, sooner or later, the Lord will always give us to drink (cf. T.J. Way 18, 3).

2 — Teresa of Jesus, speaking of the spiritual atmosphere in which contemplation ordinarily blossoms, proposes first of all an intense exercise of virtues, particularly total detachment and profound humility; and one must note that she is not satisfied with a somewhat superficial exercise, but requires that it be fully generous, indeed often requiring a truly heroic exercise. And the reason is this: contemplation is a generous gift of God, therefore it demands generosity on our part; ungenerous souls are precisely those that will not know it. It is always the great principle inculcated by the Saint: “God forces no one: He accepts what is given Him, but He does not give Himself entirely except to those who give themselves entirely to Him” (Way 28, 12).

Alongside this atmosphere of generosity, there must then be a diligent and constant application to recollection and prayer. The more the soul knows how to recollect itself in God, making its prayer and its vital contact with Him ever more intimate and deep, the more apt it will be to receive divine motions. Here, in synthesis, is what our preparation must be: on the one hand an intense exercise of mortification, of self-denial, of detachment - and this is the practice of the virtues! - and on the other an intense application to the life of prayer. (Note: we have developed this subject at length in the meditations of February and March; in the meditations of this month we shall treat instead of prayer.)

Certainly, in preparing ourselves for contemplation, we do not intend to make it the end of our spiritual life. The end is always love, since holiness consists essentially in the perfection of charity. Nevertheless, contemplation is a very powerful means for bringing us quickly to the fullness of love, and precisely for this reason we desire it. Our life is a journey toward God, a continual tending, a continual turning of our energies toward Him. Happy the soul that is powerfully drawn toward the Lord! its step becomes much more agile and rapid. This is precisely the great help that comes from contemplation. And so we understand that we must prepare ourselves for it not to enjoy its sweetnesses, but to enter fully into the way of divine intimacy, into the way of perfect love, since nothing is capable of orienting us totally to God and to his glory like that loving experience and that contemplative light which constitute the essence of contemplation.

Colloquy

“My God, if You wish to enter a soul to take your delights there and fill it with good, you have no other way than this: that the soul be alone, pure, and desirous of receiving You. But if instead of making the way smooth for You, we obstruct it more with an infinity of obstacles, how can You come? How can we claim that You give us your graces?

“What truly a marvel! We are still among a thousand hindrances, and full of imperfections; our virtues have scarcely begun to be born - and may it please You, my God, that they be at least born! - so that they do not even know how to walk; and nevertheless we are not ashamed to complain of aridities and to want sweetnesses in prayer!...

“But You, O Lord, know better than I what is fitting for me; nor is it really necessary for me to tell You what You must give me, because You could answer me, and with reason: you do not know what you ask. Intending to devote myself to prayer and disposed to receive your gifts, my only desire must be to labor with all possible diligence to resolve and prepare myself to conform my will to your will, my God. And You make me understand that precisely in this consists the greatest perfection that can be acquired on the spiritual way. The more perfect this conformity is, the more graces I shall receive from You and the greater will be my progress” (T.J. Life 8, 9; cf. M. II, 7 and 8). Grant me therefore, O Lord, to make generous resolutions, so that I may know how to give myself to You without any reserve, without any division. This is what You expect from me, and then You will come to accomplish your work.

“I am yours, my God! Do with me what You will and lead me where it pleases You best. If with your help I am truly humble and detached from everything, You will not fail to grant me the grace of prayer and many others besides, beyond all my desire” (cf. T.J. M. IV, 2, 10).