Letter 52. To a reverend and religious person
Reverend father, Pax Christi. Since our Lord Jesus Christ is not pleased that, at this time, I should be where I might enjoy the communication of yourself, and of those my Masters the Collegialls, as I had wished, let his name be blessed for all, and in the mean time I must endure it with patience. Wherein yet, me thinks, I shall not be performing a small penance, for it is a hard thing for us to endure to be divided from the persons whom we love. And in very truth I did never so much desire to be assisted by you in some things as now, For I conceive, that it might have proved greatly to the service of our Lord. But yet since by one that love's, all things are well taken, I will speak a little to you in absence, till our Lord ordain that we may be present.
Sir I much desire that we may seek God who is our total Good, and that, not after any ordinary manner, but like some one who seeks a great treasure, which is much esteemed, and for love whereof he sells all that he is worth; accounting himself rich in possessing that alone, instead of many other things, which he had before.
O God, o Lord, o thou the true repose of the most interior part of our souls; and when shall we begin, I say not to love thee, but at least to desire to love thee? When I say shall we conceive a desire of thee, such a one as may be worthy of thee? When shall verity be able to prevail more with us, than vanity? beauty, than deformity? repose, then restless care? the Creator who is so richly full, and all-sufficient, before the creature, who is so very empty, and poor? Dear Lord, and whoe, at length, will open our eyes, that we may know that there is nothing out of thee, which either hath any countenance in itself, or is able to give any true contentment to us? who will make some little discovery of thee to us; that so being all enamoured of thee, we may go, may run, may fly, and may remain eternally with thee?
Woe be to us, for we are extremely fare from God, and we are in so little pain for that distance, as that we can scarce be said to feel it. What is become of the profound, and tender sighs of those souls, which had tasted once of God, and were afterwards estranged a little from him? what is become of that holy affection, wherewith David said: If I shall give sleep to mine eyes, or slumbering to mine eyelids; till I have found a house. wherein our Lord may dwell. And this house we ourselves are, when we destroy not ourselves, by scattering our hearts upon variety of things, but recollect them to the unity of one desire, and of one love, and then it is, that we find ourselves, and are indeed the house of God.1
For my part, I believe, that he said true who affirmed the cause of our tepidity to be this, That he who hath not tasted yet of God, doth not know in very deed what it is, either to have hunger or satiety. And so we are neither hungry after God, nor are we entirely satisfied by creatures; but we remain as certain frozen things, being neither here, nor there;, full of dulness, and discouragement; & without all taste of spirit; and fit to cause a vomit in his stomach, who likes not servants who are Luke warm, but desires to have them inflamed with the fire of love. This fire himself brought into the world, and desires nothing but that it may burn; and to the end that it may do so, himself did burn, and was consumed upon the Cross, num. 19 like that red Cow, which was carried out of the camp. And this he did of set purpose, to the end that we, taking of that wood of the Cross upon ourselves, might make a fire, and might warm ourselves, and keep correspondence with so great a lover, with some love of ours, considering how just a thing it is, that we should be wounded by the sweet dart of love, since we see him not only wounded, but killed by it.2
It is but reason that we be taken by the love of him, who was taken thereby for us; & delivered over for our sakes, into such fierce hands. Let us enter into that prison of his love, since he entered into the prison of ours, and thereby was made as tame, as any lamb, before them who treated him so ill. And this prison was that, which made him remain quiet upon the Cross. For more strange, and rude, were those ropes, and prisons of his lòue, than the nails and ropes which restrained his person. These later, laying hold but upon his body, but his love being that which seized his soul. And therefore let our hearts be tied by his love (that tie of salvation) and let us not desire such liberty, as may carry us out of his prison. For as he is very ill in health, who is not wounded, and made sick of his love: so is he very ill at liberty, who is not restrained in that prison. Let us now resist him no longer, let us yield ourselves conquered by his arms, which are his benefits, whereby he procures to kill us, that so we may ever live with him. He desires to burn us up, that so the old man who was conform to Adam being consumed, the new man who is conform to Christ our Lord may rise again by love. He desires to melt our hardness, to the end that as upon mettle which is made liquid by heat, that form is imprinted which is desired by the workman; so we (being softened by that love, which makes us melt by hearing our beloved speak to us) may be ready, without all resistance, that so Christ our Lord may imprint upon us, what figure shall be most pleasing to him. Now that figure, which he desires to imprint, is no other than that of Love.
John. 15. For Christ our Lord is very Love itself; & he commanded that we should love one another, as he loved us.
And S. Paul tells us, that we must so be in love with Christ our Lord, as he loved us; and delivered himself up for us. So that unless we love, we are unlike him; our countenance hath no resemblance to his, but we are poor, naked, blind, deaf, and dumb, and dead. For love alone, is that which quickens all things, and love is that, which is the spirituall-cure of our souls. For the soul without love is just such a thing as the body is, without the soul.3
Let us therefore love, and we shall live, let us love and we shall grow like God; nay we shall wound him, who is to be wounded by love alone. Let us love and all things shall be ours, since they are all to serve us, as it is written, They that love God shall prove well in all things. If we love this love, let us apply the axe of diligence, to the root of our own self-love, and so bring this enemy of ours to the ground. What have we of ourselves! let us hedge ourselves in God, and make no account at all of any thing else. Let not our own losses trouble us, but the losses of God, which are the souls who depart from him. And because it is a hard thing, for a man to leave to love himself, let us shed many tears, whereby it may be made easy for us, to dig up this earth. Let us groan out to God, from the very profoundest of our hearts, for our tears do even wound almighty God, though they be so weak, and soft, and though he be omnipotent.
Let us entertain good thoughts, for as David saith;
My thought is a very furnace. But above all let us place ourselves, and not come quickly out again, but make our habitation, in the wounds of Christ our Lord, and particularly in his sacred side. For there his hart being divided and pierced for us, will receive ours into it, and so it will grow warm, through the greatness of his love. For who can remain in fire, and not grow warm, at least to some proportion? O that we could dwell there, and how happy should we be therein? what is the reason that we depart thence so soon? Because we take not up those five lodgings, in that high mountain of the Cross, where Christ our Lord was transfigured indeed, though not towards beauty, but towards deformity, baseness and dishonour: which lodgings are granted to us; nay we are desired to take them, though those other three tabernacles which S. Peter desired, were denied to him.4
If some little spark of this fire be kindled in our hearts, let us take great care, that the wind blow it not out, since it is so little. Let us cover it with the ashes of humility, let us hold our peace and hide it, and so we shall find it still alive.
And we must, daily add some wood to it, as God commandeth his Priests to do. And that signifies to us the doing of good works: and the not losing of any time, and, above all things, we must approach to the true fire which may kindle and inflame us, and this is Jesus Christ our Lord, in the Blessed Sacrament.5
Let us open the mouth of our soul, which is our desire, and let us go all gaping towards the fountain of living water, for so without doubt, if we take honey into our mouths, we shall have some taste thereof. And in fine if the fire be in our bosom, it will heat us. But both before and after we communicate, we must use some preparations, and reflections; and there cannot be any better, than a lively Faith, that we go then to receive Jesus Christ our Lord; together with a consideration, and love of his passion, since that mystery was instituted, in memory thereof. Being thus refreshed, let us then provide ourselves for our communicating the next time after. For he who only prepares himself, for the present time, shall seldom find himself well prepared.
Let us therefore run after God, for we may be sure enough, that he will not fly from us. He is nailed upon the Cross, and infallibly we shall find him there. Let us convey him into our hearts, and then shut the door, that he retire not thence. Let us dye to all visible things, since there will come a time, when we must leave them perforce.
Let us renew ourselves in newness of spirit since we have lived so long according to the old man.
Let us be growing in knowledge and love of Christ our Lord, who is the sovereign good. And all this is to be obtained by humble prayer, and perseverant endeavour. More is received into the soul from without the soul, then doth proceed of the soul. It is more for it to be moved and disposed, then to work when that is done. And therefore let us remove all impediments, and compose our own hearts within ourselves, expecting Christ our Lord there; who enters when the gates are shut, to visit and comfort his Disciples; and so without doubt, he will come to us. For David saith of him, Our Lord heard the desire of the poor, and his ears hearkened to the preparation of his hart. And since Christ our Lord is principally he who must work this in us, we have no reason to distrust, but taking courage and confidence in such a conductor as he is, let us begin to run that course with fervour, which ends not, but in the obtaining of God.678
And if we cannot so soon, make our hearts as subject to us as we would, let us yet endure it with patience, till God rise up and so our enemies may fall, and till he awake, and command this sea to calm itself. But then on the other side, his express pleasure is, that we have confidence in him, even in the greatest temptations, yea though our little barks should be upon the very point to sink.
Let us not therefore be disturbed, or dismayed. Let us not put others to pain, for the trouble which this continual war gives us, in threatening that we shall be overcome. The day will arrive, when God will put this country of ours into peace when we shall sleep, without any body by to wake us. And now, since this peace cannot be obtained yet, it will be a better course for us, to go sweeting and striving to root out our passions, then to keep ourselves in ease, and to content ourselves with leading a tepid life, for the avoiding of that pain which the seeking of perfection would put us to. But first let us utterly distrust ourselves, and confide in God, and let us begin in the name, and power of the omnipotent. And this beginning of ours shall be humility, which is figured in the ashes that we take; and our end shallbe love, which is figured in the resurrection of our Lord; and so we shall enjoy both a good lent, and a good Easter.
In the mean time I kiss the hands, of all my Masters your Collegialls, and I recommend myself to their prayers. And say you to them in my name, that I beseech them that we may love both God, and our neighbours, in great measure. That so at the day of judgement, we may know well how to answer; and that we may be made doctors, & be received into the College of the Angels, and Saints, where we shall ever, study the book of life, which is God himself, who will for ever stand open before our eyes, that we may know him, & love him, and for ever be in possession of him. Our Lord Jesus remain, ever with you. Amen.
Footnotes
Chapter 22 of 57