Chapter 15: How agreeable works of charity are to God ; and also meditation* on holy things

The day of Thine adorable Nativity, I took Thee from the crib, wrapped in swathing-clothes, like a little infant newly born, and placed Thee in my heart, that I might make a bouquet of myrrh of all thy infant sufferings and incommodities, to place it in my breast, that I might drink there- from a libation * of Divine sweetness. But as I considered this the greatest favour Thou couldest bestow on me, Thou, who, when we least expect it, accompaniest Thy first graces by others yet more precious, didst will to diversify the abundance of Thy graces in this manner.

For on the same day, the following year, as the Mass Dominus dixit t was said, I received Thee, coming forth from the virginal womb of Thy Mother as a feeble and delicate Infant, arid carried Thee for some time in my arms. It seemed to me that the compassion which I had shown before the Feast, by some special prayers for a per son in affliction, had obtained this favour for me ; but, alas ! after having obtained it, I did not receive it with the devotion I ought. I know not if it were an act of Thy justice, or a chastisement of my negligence ; I hope, never theless, that Thy justice, by the intermission of Thy mercy has so ordered it, to make me know more clearly the great ness of my unworthiness, and to make me less negligent in putting away idle thoughts. But it is for Thee, 0 Lord, to say to which of these causes I ought to refer this effect.

Nevertheless, as I gathered up all my strength to make a last effort to gain Thee by my loving caresses, I per ceived that all this was of no avail, until I commenced praying for sinners, for the souls in purgatory, or for those who were in any affliction, when I knew that I was heard ,• but still more one evening, when I formed the resolution of commencing the prayers which I say for the deceased, offering them for those most beloved by Thee, with the t Introit, First or Midnight Mass at Christmas.

Collect, Omnipotent, sempiterne Deus, cui nunquam sine spe, instead of commencing, as I had been accustomed to do, by praying for those related to me, with the Collect, Deus, qui nos patrem et matrem ; and it seemed to me that this change was very pleasing to Thee.

I believe also that it pleased Thee much, when I chanted as loud as I could, and at each note fixed my in tention on Thee, as one fixes his eye on his book, who has not yet learned the chant perfectly. Still I know that I have been negligent in this and in other things which con cern Thy glory ; and I confess it to Thee, Father of mercy, asking pardon through the bitter Passion of Thy blameless Son Jesus Christ, in whom Thou didst declare Thyself well pleased, saying : " This is My beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased " (St Matt, xvii.) ; through Him I ask the grace of amendment and atonement for my negligences.