Chapter XVIII

Continuation of the same subject. Shows that contemplatives have to bear far heavier crosses than people who lead the active life. This chapter offers great consolation to the latter.¹

1. Trials of the contemplative life. 2. Its reward. 3. Preparation for contemplation. 4. Contemplatives bear the standard of humility. 5. The virtues preferable to supernatural favours. 6. Obedience. 7. Danger of supernatural favours.

1. Daughters, I assure those of you whom God does not lead by the way of contemplation that both by observation and experience I know that those following it do not bear a lighter cross than you: but indeed you would be aghast at the different kinds of trials God sends them. I know a great deal of both vocations, and am well aware that the sufferings God inflicts on contemplatives are of so unbearable a kind that, unless He sustained such souls by the manna of divine consolations, they would find their pains insupportable. God guides those He loves by the way of afflictions; the dearer they are to Him, the more severe are their trials. It is incredible that He should hate contemplatives whom He Himself praises and calls His friends, and absurd to imagine that He would admit self-indulgent and easy-going people into His friendship; I feel certain that God gives by far the heaviest crosses to His favourites. The road He chooses for them is so uneven and rugged as to make them fancy that they have lost their way and that they must turn back again and start afresh. Then His Majesty is obliged to give them some refreshment² — water would not be enough, it must be wine;³ inebriated⁴ with this draught from God they become unconscious of their pain and enabled to sustain it. Thus one rarely finds true contemplatives who are not valiant and resolved to suffer. If they are weak, the first thing our Lord does is to infuse courage into them so that they may fear no trials.⁵ I believe that those who lead the active life, when they see that contemplatives occasionally receive consolation, imagine that their life consists of nothing else; yet perhaps you might not be able to bear such trials as theirs for a single day.⁶ Our Lord knows for what everybody is suited, and gives each one what is best for her soul, for His own glory, and for the good of her neighbour. As none of you have chosen your own work, you need have no fear that it will be labour lost.

2. Pay attention to what I am saying, for we all have to serve God, and that not for one or two years, or for ten years either, that we should desert our duties like cowards. It is well to show our Lord that we are not defaulters; we must be like soldiers who receive their pay whether they fight or no, and so must always stand at their post, ready to set to work whenever their captain gives his orders. How much better pay shall we receive from our King than they get from theirs, for sometimes the poor fellows die in battle and God knows what wages they get afterwards! The captain reviews his regiment as it stands on service and knows the capabilities of each soldier, although not so well as our heavenly Captain knows ours. He assigns to them the duties for which they are fit, but if the men were absent they would receive neither pay nor orders.

3. Therefore, sisters, practise mental prayer, and if you cannot manage that, then vocal prayer, reading, and the colloquies with God which I will teach you later on. Never give up your hours of prayer: you do not know when the Bridegroom will summon you, and you might share the fate of the foolish virgins.⁷ Our Lord may give you some heavier cross under the guise of divine consolations. If He does not, be convinced that you are not meant for contemplation but for the active life. This will give you an opportunity of gaining merit through humility. Let such a one believe that she is unworthy even of the place she holds. Let her cheerfully do what she is told, and as I said,⁸ if only her humility is genuine, blessed is such a servant in the active life, for she will complain of none but herself, and I would far rather resemble her than some contemplatives with whom I am acquainted.

4. Let her leave others to wage their own wars, which are no easy ones. Though standard-bearers, like officers, do not actually fight, yet they expose themselves to great danger and must suffer, in a way, more than the rest of the men because they carry the colours which they must not relinquish, even though they themselves are being cut to pieces. In the same way, contemplatives must uphold the standard of humility, and must bear all the blows aimed at them without making any reprisal, for their duty is to suffer as Christ did, bearing aloft the cross and never letting it fall, whatever the danger may be, unless they would prove cowards in suffering. It is for this they are advanced to their high and honourable office. Do you suppose the position given them by the King is an easy one? For the sake of some slight distinction they undertake to incur far more danger than the rest, and if they turn cowards the battle will go against their side. Let contemplatives, then, look to their conduct, for if the standard-bearer quits his colours the day will be lost: in the same way, I believe that souls less advanced in religion are much injured by seeing those they hold as captains and friends of God act in a way ill suiting their position. The common soldiers march as they can: if sometimes they withdraw from the thick of the fray, no one notices them and they lose neither their honour nor their lives, but all eyes are on the standard-bearer who cannot move without being seen. His duty is a noble one and a great honour, and the King shows him special favour by his choice; but he has undertaken a heavy responsibility.

5. My daughters, as we do not understand our own needs nor what to ask for, let us leave all to our Lord⁹ Who knows us better than we know ourselves. A lowly heart is content with what is given it, yet there are people who ask for favours from God as a matter of simple justice.¹⁰ What humility! Therefore He Who knows all things rightly abstains from granting these gifts to such persons, seeing them unfit to drink of His chalice.¹¹ The best sign that any one has made progress is that she thinks herself the last of all and proves it by her behaviour, and that she aims at the wellbeing and good of others in all that she does. This is the true test¹² — not sweetness in prayer, ecstasies, visions, and other divine favours of the same kind. The value of these latter we cannot estimate rightly until the next life, but the former are current coin, a constant revenue and a perpetual inheritance, not mere part-payments which, when acquitted, cease — I speak of great humility and mortification, and implicit obedience¹³ which will not disobey one tittle of the orders given by the Prioress, but submits to them as to the commands of God, of Whom she is the representative.¹⁴

6. Obedience is of the greatest importance; she who is lacking in it is not a nun at all: I will say no more about this, as I am speaking to nuns who are good religious, I believe, or at least desire to be so. But as obedience is most essential I mention it lest you might forget this. I cannot understand what any one is doing in a monastery if, after she has made a vow of obedience, she does not fulfil it as perfectly as possible.¹⁵ I can assure her that while she fails in this she will never reach contemplation, or even lead the active life well: of this I am certain. Those who have not undertaken this obligation, but who wish to become contemplatives must, if they would walk in safety, resolutely submit their will to an experienced confessor. It is a well known fact that they will thus make more progress in a year than they would otherwise have done in a very long time! Much has been written on this subject; however, as it does not concern you I will not enlarge upon it.

7. These, then, are the virtues that I wish you, my daughters, to possess and to strive to obtain, and of which you should feel a holy envy. You must not be distressed if you do not experience these other devotional feelings which are unreliable. Although in the case of other people they may come from God, yet in yours He might permit them to be an illusion of the devil, who would mislead you as he has misled others. Such illusions are very dangerous for women. Why run into danger in serving our Lord when there are so many secure ways of doing so? Who wants you to incur such risk? There is need for much insistence on this point for we are weak by nature, though God will strengthen those He calls to be contemplatives. I am glad to have given this advice to other persons: it will also animate those called to the contemplative life to practise humility. If you say you do not require it, daughters, perhaps some novice will enter later on who will be glad of it. May our Lord give us light to follow His will in all things, and then we shall have nothing to fear!